Unfortunately; Fortunately

Fortunately, someone finds a mystical sword and slays the great beast before it can reach the time wasters.

Unfortunately, the mystical sword mutates into a sentient being after getting soaked in the great beast's blood, and it turns on its wielder.

Fortunately that wielder was charcoalspacewolfman, and he had no idea how to defeat the sword.

How is that fortunate?

Unfortunately, the sword was Pundit, and he cleaved the world in twain.

Fortunately when I died I came back as Anubis and dragged Pundit to the afterlife.

Unfortunately, the Anubis/charcoalspacewolfman entity becomes confused about his/its identity and commits suicide.

Fortunately, since charcoalspacewolfman is Anubis, God of death, when he commits suicide, he drags himself to the afterlife and refuses to come back, which means no one dies ever again.

Unfortunately, he comes back as a zombie, hungry for power. And brains, of course. And maybe some cupcakes with tea.

Fortunately he passes a tea and cupcake place and is no longer hungry for brains

Unfortunately when he came back, pundit also came back.

Fortunately I don't know what that means!

Unfortunately, your ignorance is the reason YWS is falling apart.

Fortunately, I'm also helping the community grow

Unfortunately everyone is in Communist Russia, so those extra people have to be snipped off.

Fortunately, they're snipped of painlessly.