Unfortunately; Fortunately

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Fortunately, the epidemic came just in time to quell the growing number of sharks.
-ж-Ж-ж-




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Unfortunately, local fishermen caught the fish and sold them to markets, plaguing the human race with the epidemic.
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Gender Female
Points 1072
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Fortunately, you're a freak of nature, and therefore, do not fall under the definition of "A member of the human race". Thus, you escape the epidemic. Just don't eat fish or humans, you freak.
Michael: Ellen broke up with me.
Christine: What? Why?
Micheal: She thinks she's gonna die this week.[...]I lived a whole life with a woman I didn't even really like. We traveled all over the world together. And Ellen and I never even left the grounds.




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Unfortunately, scientists have found a vaccine for the epidemic, and now spend their time experimenting on freaks of nature. Looks like you're on the run.

*Just gotta say, I love how I'm the one coming up with all the Unfortunatelys - and that it doesn't take my effort xD*
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Gender Female
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Fortunately, as a Freak of Nature, you fall under "FREAKS OF NATURE: KENYAN". Discovered by Darwin while traveling in Africa, you have the ability to run the speed of Speed. So out run you can do-sneakers or no sneakers.
Michael: Ellen broke up with me.
Christine: What? Why?
Micheal: She thinks she's gonna die this week.[...]I lived a whole life with a woman I didn't even really like. We traveled all over the world together. And Ellen and I never even left the grounds.




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Gender Female
Points 1193
Reviews 262
Unfortunately, your eyesight is horrible and you run into a concrete wall, severely damaging yourself.
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Gender Female
Points 1072
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Fortunately, the part damaged was only from the waist up. Though blinded and profusely bleeding, on you run!
Michael: Ellen broke up with me.
Christine: What? Why?
Micheal: She thinks she's gonna die this week.[...]I lived a whole life with a woman I didn't even really like. We traveled all over the world together. And Ellen and I never even left the grounds.




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Gender Female
Points 1193
Reviews 262
Unfortunately, the part of your brain that determines your motor skills is damaged, so your speed and coordination is greatly lowered.
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Gender Male
Points 1150
Reviews 5
Fortunately it also damaged another part of you brain, which actally allows you to keep them from seeing you.
If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.
George Orwell




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Gender Female
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Unfortunately, with all of this brain damage, you cannot function properly so you end up on the ground, convulsing, waiting for death.
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Gender Male
Points 13307
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Fortunately, while waiting for death, a passing phoenix gives you the secret to renewable life.
-ж-Ж-ж-




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Gender Female
Points 1193
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Unfortunately, the secret is you need to sell your soul to Death (literally).
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Gender Male
Points 1150
Reviews 5
Fortunately, Death happened to be there for you to sell your soul to.
If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.
George Orwell




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Gender Male
Points 13307
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(Pundit, how is that fortunate? :P)

Unfortunately, Death didn't like the taste of your life. Go get a new real one.
-ж-Ж-ж-




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Gender Female
Points 8691
Reviews 180
Fortunately, you got a real life.
You must be swift as the coursing river,
With all the force of a great typhoon,
With all the strength of a raging fire,
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon.



The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animal.
— H. L. Mencken