Young Writers Society

Sally to Jaikal: I'm Pain and I luuuuuuurve you! *muffled laughter* My voice is a little different because ... uh ... I have a ... um ... a ... cold? Yes, I have a cold. Come meet me tonight. I won't stand you up. Promise.

Sorry about Sally. She can be a bit silly. And rather unsubtle.

Sally's answering machine: Hi! This is the Semmel house, but none of us are hear right now. If you're calling for Valerie can you please state clearly whether you are male or female, and if you are male whether you would call yourself hot. Mum wants to know which calls not to pass on. Thanks! BEEP.

Jaikal to Sally:
You are dead. Dead. I will slice your throat. I will stop your heart. You are dead. *click*

Myron to Sally:
Good day, this is Myron. I am male, and I am also incredibly hot. Call me. *pause. Bursts out laughing* Sorry, wrong number. I just couldn't resist. Bye! *click*

Kazamir's answering machine:
This is the voicemail of Kazamir, repeatedly decorated chief general of Naryen-Mair. I'm probably off fighting bitters battles with courage and honor right now, and if you wish to contact me, leave a message after the beep. Long live the emperor! *BEEP*

Seth to Kazamir:
"Uhhhh... okay, this is weirder than everything else I've ever said or done in the past month. And that is saying A LOT. *uncomfortable silence* Justin is going to kill me. Errr, good luck with your... Crusade or whatever. Bye."

Holly to Kazamir:
"Hi there Cheif General, I know we might not see each other much in the next few days, but in any case, if you do, could you PLEASE pinch me to make sure I'm not dreaming? Please? Okay, that's all, bye." *click*

Seth's Answering Machine:
"Hey, you're calling but I'm not picking up. I'm probably out doing things that I still can't quite beleive I'm doing. I also probably violated ten copyrights while you're listening to this recording. Such is my life. Leave a message."

Monessa to Seth: *chants and draws signs* Hah! You won't be bothering me again!

Brenna: You probably will never hear from me but go ahead and leave a message, someone might pick up.

Jether to Brenna: Hey, I think I know you! You're the one in the story my writer was editing, aren't you? Hey, that's cool! Although it's really not nice of you to leave such an unfriendly message, are you lonely sometimes? Because I've heard that people who are lonely sometimes shove people away because-- (Answering machine cuts him off)

Avanmore's answering machine
Greetings, unknown caller. At the moment I'm probably fencing with the emperor, foiling an assasination attempt, or testing my luck with Power far beyond my comprehension. Leave a message after the tone, and if I'm still alive I will make every attempt to return your call. *Chime*

Donald to Avanmore:[b] Good morning. I suppose you are a good friend of Sunny Atoll? Yes? Or are you aquaintances of the U.N. No? Okay, I suppose you are wasting my time.

[b]Donald's Answering Machine My Salutuations. Donald Lizard is now currently joing political meetings, or is in battle in a place without reliable means of communication. Dial later. I will try to receive your message within all means.

Brenna: Hey, sunshine. You forgot your papers.

Monessa: I'm in the library, if you wait another hour I can get back to you. But I'll have to find a way to get this thing to stop beeping.

Seth: Ehol, if you don't understand ignore me.

Answearing machine: Hello, this is the answearing machine of Seth Ranlais. I am not currently here, and if the guards ask where I was, I was here.

Monessa to Answering Machine: I'm not lying for anyone.

Brenna: If you're Shafter then um.. please help me get Myth. Anyone else, feel free to leave a message or my clarinet, I've misplaced it somewhere...

Jether to Brenna: Salutations, Brenna! Well, I'm not Shafter, but I do have access to quite a lot of her thoughts and I'll tell her to find Myth for you. What's the matter, your writer not writing you? Oh gosh, I have the exact same problem, in fact right now my writer isn't writing a single thing about me, she's concentrating on Émon and Avanmore and Eiamar and all those fancy-shmancy people and-- (Answering machine cuts him off)

Kirt's personal answering machine: Okay, I don't know how you got ahold of this number, but if you don't identify yourself as one of my friends, I'm not calling you back. *pause* Unless, of course, you're Mother. Yes, Mother, I have been washing every day. *BEEP*

Ket to Kirt: So this is what happnes if you punch in random numb- What? Oh, well, I don't think I'm one of your friends, and I'm pretty sure I'm not your mother. But I still got to waste a few second of your life. HA!

Wires: Yes. This is Wires. Now, tell me what you want before I decide that I need your eyes and liver. *BEEP*

Brenna: I'd like to keep all my 'parts', thank you.

Monessa: If you've lost anything, it means I've been in your house. And you won't be getting it back, so hang up.

Narvik to Monessa:
Ah, I see. Well then. *Hangs up*

Narvik's answering machine:
Hello, you know who you've reached. If you're a customer, press one. If you're a friend, press two. If you're a relative, hang up. And if you're one of those people from the past I want to forget, then press three and dial in the recognition code. *sigh* Hope you're a friend... *BEEP*

Monessa: Wait... So you're not Sebastian? *hangs up*

Brenna: Hello. If you're that Jether person here is some advice: Use shorter sentences. You won't get cut o---[Machine cuts her off]

Jaist to Brenna:
Well, I see your method works. I shall inform Jether. [Machine almost cuts him off]

Terian's answering machine:
Good day to you, friend, you've reached the answering machine of Terian, Prince of Ralaif-Avin. I'm out riding my panther right now, so if you want to leave a message for me, press one, and if you want to leave a message for my panther Raven, press two. Have a lovely, death-free day. *Chime*