I Am Totally a Real-Life Wizard (Not Clickbait, I Swear!)

Dawn laughed. "True, but oh, it was so satisfying to see you bonded to that fool after you made fun of me for the last person I was bonded to."

"He was a lazybones who refused to go on quests! What else was I supposed to do, compliment you on getting fooled by all his initial talk of glory?" Dusk glowed a magenta-purple, and Dawn blushed pale pink.

"Wait, wait." Vendetta waved their hands. "You can bond to just regular people."

Dusk sighed. "Unfortunately, yes. We have bonded to some Average Joes before. And Standard Williams. And Everyday Leons."

"What do you do then?"

"We just tough it out until they either release us from the bond or die." Dawn bobbed up and down in the air in a shrug. "Mortal lifespans aren't that long... although I've got to admit that fifty years feels a lot longer when you're stuck being summoned to the same not-so-bright person whenever they need a light. Pun not intended."

"I can't imagine using a magical sentient sword as a glorified flashlight." Vendetta shook their head. "That's so disrespectful."

Dusk sighed. "It's the luck of the draw, really. But you two are good heroes to be bonded to. I wouldn't mind hanging around one hundred years!"

"A-a hundred years. Wow," Valeri muttered. "Let's see if you regret that when I start becoming old and senile..."

Dawn hummed. "But if you master magic by then, at least you'll be able to use it to stay healthy! Which brings us back to reading these books." The sword drifted towards the tomes on the table.

"Oh joy." Valeri made a face. "I think I'd much rather keep listening to stories."

“Couldn’t you teach us some potions and spells?” Vendetta drummed their fingers on the table. “It seems like you two have come across a lot of wizards in your time. Maybe you remember some.”

Dusk hummed, turning to Dawn. “What do you think? Should we step in as teachers?”

Dawn glowed a thoughtful sky blue. "Why not? We should probably teach them how to summon us as well, and what else we can do."

"That's right! Dawn, didn't you say you had some kind of fiery powers?" Valeri asked.

"Did I?" Dawn hummed. "It's quite possible. I think-- hmm. It had something to do with sunlight striking my gem...?" Suddenly Dawn blinked bright yellow. "Oh, my gem can focus sunlight into a flame!"

"A flaming sword. That has to look threatening, even if Dawn is entirely nonviolent." Vendetta gasped. "You can teach me all of the powers of your arrows."

Dusk vibrated in excitement. "Yes! I can."

"Oh, you're in for a treat!" Dawn cheered. "Dusk's arrows are super neat. And my flames aren't half bad either-- along with looking threatening, they're quite useful for roasting marshmallows." The sword twirled in the air, then said, "Dusk, do you want me to help you do a dramatic introduction for each of your arrows?"

Dusk laughed. "Of course, my dear sibling! They all deserve a dramatic introduction."

Vendetta laughed. "How dramatic is this going to be?"

Dawn glowed a bright pastel pink. "You'll just have to see."

Dusk cleared its throat. "Coming up first in an arrow you've already met, but is no less deserving of a fantastic intro, Orchid!"

"Orchiiiid! Orchid Orchid Orchid!" Dawn flashed yellow and pink, throwing sparkles of light all around the room.

The arrow flew through the lightshow and twirled in front of the siblings.

"Orchid manipulates light. So, they can glow, but they can also create shadows and darkness."

The space around Orchid was consumed by shadow, hiding Orchid completely.

Vendetta cocked their head to the side. "Wow! That's fascinating. Do they absorb the light?"

Dusk hummed in agreement. "Yep!

Dawn hummed in harmony with Dusk. "Each of Dusk's arrows has a super special ability, but Orchid is my personal favorite. Wink."

"Wait, did you just say 'wink'?" Valeri raised an eyebrow.

Dawn blushed pale pink. "Well, it's not like I have eyes... I gotta make do with what I have, which is speech, y'know."

"Oookay. Well then. Who's the next arrow?"

"Drumroll, please."

Vendetta giggled, dutifully drumming their fingers on the table.

"Lavender!"

"Laaaavendeeer!!" cheered Dawn.

A pale purple arrow floated shyly in front of the siblings. It spun like a compass needle and pulsed, well, lavender.

"Lavender is a wonderful tracker. They're probably the one who first detected my quiver!" Dusk glowed a proud indigo-purple.