The Fateful Heart

"I could go," she volunteered a bit too quickly. She tried not to sound eager, but she realized she was failing.

"I mean, think about it," she quickly added, deciding to play on his logical side. "You've taught me how to survive, and I can ride on Elliot." She glanced at Elliot, and even though they've bonded this past week, she still shot him a huffy face. "Kind of."

She continued on anyways.

"But overall, I'm much more equipped to handle this thing myself. I can do it."

She gingerly pushed down on his map with two fingers so he can meet her eyes and see that she was serious.

"I can do it. Right? It makes more sense for just me to go."

James glanced down at the map and looked back up at her.

"It does," he said hesitantly. "I just don't know that it's worth the risk."

He didn't want to say we can live without soap, because the thought made his skin itch, but it was what he was thinking. Then again, that could very well lead to... another infection. And they didn't want that.

"And I hardly have any money in the first place, which would mean you'd have to find work first, or work in exchange for goods. And who knows how long that could take."

Oh, right. They had almost no money.

But if this was the main roadblock to not going into a town, she could work with this.

"I could help get money," Evaline said, not really thinking through her words since her mind was racing through this opportunity. "What kind of work is typically available in a town?"

James looked up at the sky and sighed. "It depends," he said, before looking back down at the map, holding it a little closer and looking at the town marked on it.

"This one's at the edge of the deserts. It's a lot larger than the last one we were at, so it might be harder to navigate. That means there will be a lot more options -- I'm just concerned you might get lost in it, and people would be able to tell you're new and don't know what you're doing. I just don't want you getting taken advantage --" he stopped himself and sighed, changing the subject. "It really depends on what relevant skills you have. If I were the one looking for a one-off job I might see if there was a ranch in the area looking for ranch-hands paid by the hour. But you're not that experienced with animals. What kind of work have you done before?"

Evaline decided to ignore his concern for her getting lost and getting taken advantage of. She figured James would mention that, but at this point, she was much more comfortable in Nye. She could blend in better. It wasn't like she was a kid. She could defend herself if she needed to.

She thought through his question of what work she had done in the past. Her most relevant answers happen to not be relevant in Nye. At least, she assumed so; she wouldn't know without fully saying what her experiences were out loud for James to confirm.

But one thing did come to mind that may be useful.

"Well. You know I can draw people. Is there a market for that?"

James took in a sharp breath and stared out into the forest blankly.

"Yes..." he said, very unenthusiastically. "Sometimes local authorities hire sketch artists to draw up wanted posters. In a town this size, they probably do that."

"Well, okay then," she said through a forced relieved smile, failing to see the irony of the situation. "I can do that then. Does it pay decently?"

James couldn’t even try to force a smile in return. He still didn’t like any of this.

“It’s not the most common skill. For someone as good as you are, I’m sure you’ll be paid well for your work.”

He looked back down at the map.

“You just might have to ask directions to the sheriff’s office.”

So not only could she obtain necessary supplies, but she could also make decent money and potentially come back with a surplus. Evaline saw nothing wrong with this plan.

"Great!" she said enthusiastically. "I could do that." She nodded. "I could do this."

It was hard to tell if she was trying to convince James or herself.

She looked back at him, determination washing over her face. "I am doing this, then. Right?"

James sighed and pursed his lips, looking back down at the map in thought. Practically, it made sense. They needed supplies, and they needed money, and this was probably the best solution they had that didn't involve him or Elliot going into town - and the two of them could be a giant red flag to anyone who knew what to look for.

But he didn't have a good feeling about it.

Maybe, he would leave some things up to chance, and provide her with some incentive.

"Perhaps," he said. "On one condition. You must pass a horse-riding exam. I will be carefully critiquing your form in the saddle and your ability to communicate to Elliot when to stop and start to transition into various speeds. If your performance is anything less than adequate, we'll push forward for another week and make do until we make it to the next nearest town. If you pass, we'll backtrack a little and make a day trip, and you can hopefully find a job, and get the things we need. Deal?"

An ultimatum. Or perhaps a bet. Whatever this new condition James proposed, Evaline wasn't a big fan of it. It was clear that he was trying to set her up for failure since her progress has been slow, and he didn't seem to want her to go to the town by herself.

But Evaline can be stubborn when it comes to independence.

She reached out and slid the map away from his fingers, carefully folding it up before returning it back to him.

"Deal," she said with a smirk, but she was careful to not be too confident or cocky about it. She wasn't fully sure she would even be able to pass this exam, but she had to try and give it her best shot.

"Alright," James said, folding up the map and stowing it away. "Well. We still have a whole day ahead of us, so let's test you now. Better not to waste any time." He patted Elliot on the side. "There's a clear patch of grass a little further down. Let's hurry down there. Are you ready?"

"Sure," Evaline said quietly, nodding. "Yes. Okay."

It made sense they do it now, and also it just occurred to her that he said they would have to backtrack to go to the town, which she wasn't sure was a good idea. But the stubborn side of her pushed that thought away because she wanted to prove she could win this and go to the town by herself without any problems.

"So what are the rules?" she asked as they headed towards the open field. "What's your scoring criteria for 'adequate'?"

James nodded as he started leading Elliot and walking beside her.

"Fair question. I'll only be grading you on things we've already practiced before. Mounting, dismounting, signaling speed. Starting, stopping, and keeping form. I won't correct you on anything - I'll just be watching to see if you do it right. If I notice too many things you're doing wrong - especially things I've pointed out in the past week - then you'll probably fail. But if you manage to do everything without any major issues, you'll pass. It's not an exact grading scale, and I haven't formulated exact percentages in my head, if that's what you're looking for. But I have enough experience with horses and riding to know what's passable and what is too big of a problem. But I will promise to grade you fairly, and without bias."

Evaline nodded, gathering up the confidence to do well. "Okay, sounds fair to me," she said, turning to him once they reach the clearing. "What do I do first?"

James stood by Elliot's side, holding the lead. "Mount up."

Luckily this was something she didn't have much trouble with. She set one foot on the stirrup and pulled herself up with the saddle, using the momentum to swing her other leg over. She took a second to adjust herself on the seat, being extra careful to be balanced. Pleased with the result, she looked over at James expectedly.

"Start Elliot off real slow," James instructed.

"Okay," she said quietly as she applied a bit more pressure on her legs to stay grounded on the saddle, then directing her focus on everything that he had told her the days leading up to this. Squeeze your legs. Keep your heels firm on the stirrups. Don't slouch. Apply the right amount of tension on the reins.

Ready, she clicked her tongue and applied a bit more pressure on her legs to cue Elliot to walk forward. And that was exactly what Elliot did. As Elliot walked forward at a slow pace, James started leading them in a wide circle.

The amount of concentration Evaline was putting into this was unreal. Although the end result wasn't critical, she acted like it was. She felt like she had to prove herself, even though a little part of her wasn't even sure she could pass this test. But, surprisingly, everything came together. Elliot didn't seem to stop at random moments like he had when she practiced, and somehow, she managed to maintain speed.

"Alright, now bring Elliot to a stop," he said.

"Whoa," she said to Elliot.

And there was no anxiety to it. She leaned back a bit and lightly tugged on the reins, stiffening her body before applying a different amount of pressure on her legs to signal for him to stop.

Elliot followed her lead beautifully. In a way, it was like a dance. She was leading Elliot, and Elliot was following her lead. Maybe they had just had bad connection before, and today, things were different.

"Alright, now speed it back up again, just a little."

Things were moving like clockwork. Evaline was wondering how she managed to not mess anything up—at least, she didn't think she messed up—but she didn't want to dwell on this thought too much. Not when she was doing so well already. She had to focus.

She followed through the procedure to speed up, and also followed through his other orders.

"Alright. One last time," James said. "Slow him down gradually, then bring him to a stop right at that tree."

This was a little more tricky, but she was doing so well so far, and she was riding on the high. She could do this. She could.

She repeated the memory in her head of the lesson James went through days ago to gradually slow down, and she made sure to follow everything he said that day. Posture. Pressure. Signal.

And she did it.

"Whoa," she signaled again to Elliot, but it came out more of a laugh. This seemed so surreal. It didn't even feel real. There may have been a few times where she could have improved, but overall, this was her best session yet. During the test, she had to stop herself from grinning and looking at James with a 'I did it, did you see that?' kind of look because she had to concentrate, but now that she was finished, she couldn't stop herself from doing exactly that.

"Now hop down. You can dismount."

She almost wanted to jump off Elliot in excitement, but she realized that this was probably the last part of the test, so she carefully and slowly dismounted from Elliot, giving him a quick pat on the back before swiveling around to James with the biggest grin.

Her head was buzzing. She didn't even know if she officially passed, and she definitely couldn't read the result from his stoic face, but she didn't care. Even if he was a tough grader and he picked up on things she didn't notice, she felt like she passed without a single problem.

It felt good to finally succeed so well over something that was so hard to do.

"Did you see that?!" she exclaimed, not even bothering to hide how thrilled she was. "I didn't know I could do that. I don't know what happened, but I... I did it. I did it!"

She was pacing, trying to control her excitement, but letting it loose for just a minute. It was so rare for her to be in a celebratory mood. It felt trivial to be this happy over something like doing the basics of horse-riding, but their days were becoming routine, and nowadays there were few things that she could look forward to and improve upon.

"I can ride Elliot now! No problems. No problems, right? I did it? I really did it? Ah, I can't believe it!"

She was turning back and forth, facing James as she paced and twirled around, not giving him enough time to even talk in-between her responses.

"Your lessons have helped. Thank you for helping me. Hah, I never thought I'd have to ride a horse in my life, and now—" she paused and stood next to him to gesture around them, "—now I can ride Elliot by myself! Well, kind of. I know I still have a long way to go, but this helps, and I..."

She didn't know how to explain this feeling. Happy? Accomplished? Success? Pride?

Whatever it was, it propelled her enough to smile and lean in, cupping his face with her hands and giving him a quick kiss on the lips.

"Thank you!" she said, letting go and twirling back again. She stopped and faced him one last time, finally realizing he didn't even speak. "Oh, and... I did pass? Right?"