xXTheBlackSheepXx

“Your Highness, Maverick’s forces have broken into the castle! We’ve got to run!” Taro cried. The queen stood up, her long blonde hair blowing in the wind. how could it ...

'... What is this place?' Louis awoke when he heard Eden's voice in the dark. He did not speak, and could hardly manage to breathe past the pain in his ...

This can’t be real… Ava, in denial, stood beside Kevin, watching Greg sob over Titi’s form. She felt the beginnings of a sob rising in her chest, coming closer and ...

Hey, Kladi!! Sorry I couldn't get back to you in time! Anyways, here's the review, I hope it helps with your story! :) We weaved through the thick-trunked oaks like ...

Here it is! :D Louis mounted the hill, pausing a moment to both view the land before him, and to allow Eden time to catch up. He craned his neck ...

Hi! I came on here looking for something to review, and then I remembered the picture I reviewed of yours a while back. So I decided to take a look ...

Hiya! The blood red sky danced off the twinkling white snow. The light dulled to a pale orange as the sun disappeared beneath the huge grey mountains. Realistically, it would ...

Hey Shubbs, I love the look of this new novel, the picture up top is really awesome. I'll try my best to give you some advice, though I'm sure you ...

Hi there! :) A few nitpicks- I groaned pulling my robe around my thin pajama's. no apostrophe - pajamas . I slowly climbed down the stairs and headed towards the ...

Hi there! Congratulations on starting your first story :D I always love reading about spies :) First off, the first few paragraphs are supposed to capture the reader's attention. To ...

Your pace is so fast, slow it down! We just found out Greg and Titi were in this world, and then she dies not one page later. Also, you bring ...

Louis pressed a cool cloth to the hollow of her neck, looking up at Violet at the same instant to make sure that she was still sleeping. The woman caught ...

Five: “Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints. (Ephesians 6:18)” Pound, pound, pound. Ava awoke

Four: “Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid...for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, ...

Very short, but I honestly couldn’t find anything wrong with it. I like the pace you have in this chapter, it’s very smooth. You’re giving depth to your characters which ...