writerwithacause

This was good, but something missed. It wasn't poetic enough, let's say. I don't know if it really is a "fan-fiction" to those serials, because I've never watched them (only ...

Heym great idea! So it's about her that broke up with him, I suppose? Anyway, great idea (as I said before) to express this in only 150 words... or so. ...

Oooh this was sweet! Herat-breaking indeed. I loved this part: "It was obvious he fancied you. I hated him." Also, first person narration works best with this kind of stories! ...

Nice poem you've got here! I enjoyed it. Though... although the format is interesting with all those short stanzas, I would suggest to group them into four lines at least. ...

I'm sure that your story has a background somewhere... Is it a side story or related to something.. anything? :P Because it felt like I don't have enough details about ...

Yeah, I agree with everyone above me. This is a great beginning of a story! I liked the beginning very much, you've managed to get an interesting, captivating beginning and ...

Hey, this wa actually a great poem! You've written it very well. I really like this part: Big smiles of innocence, He hadn't yet discovered tears, This little guy surrounded ...

Waa.. this is a great poem! You have a way with words. Now onto the technical part... All that I've done is reeked with the stench of love -- a ...

Day dreams, nightly schemes. Daily wishes, of late night kisses. Inside me dwells a fantasy, Of what we could be. -- love this part! In my mind dwells imaginings, Of ...

count on me New postby tomi6 on Tue Jul 05, 2011 4:48 am bad day , every day ! when will you rid this pain ? -- rid? as in ...

itting alone, wasting away on the bombarded city streets, Broken dreams, and lost hopes litter the ground, The stark stench of failure fills the air. Innocent bodies hang from sinful ...

My heart begs , My mind screams For me to let go , But that's what you get From a couple of teen You'd think that I would know . ...

I peeked out of the window of the airplane, Looking down at England , but in vain. -- it seems to me that you forced this just in order to ...

Nice poem. I've only one suggestion to make: In the line: ‘Cuz sooner then light travels, replace 'cuz with 'cause. There are also some punctuation marks that you've omitted, such ...

You, debonair, you paint sparkles in the moonlight While some could never thrive through the day . All the city folk look at you in a blue light ; Strangely, ...