skylnn00writes

First of all, this story is really good. Second, all your commas should be inside the quotation marks when it applies. Also, you do not need commas after any of ...

First paragraph: you wrote her instead of here. I wanted to keep reading however when I read this. Also, all of your commas are outside of your quotation marks. Make ...

I opened this story with the intent of writing a review, and I almost couldn't find anything wrong with this. You are an absolutely amazing writer and this chapter to ...

Some small errors: 1. "Outside, in the dark," I believe you do not need the first comma after outside. 2. "Sleep seemed impossible, a small piece of his day that ...

I would like to say that your writing is absolutely amazing. I loved in the first paragraph the comparrison to the moon and her vulnerability. It truly captured me and ...