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Re: Alias
Heya, So yes, I did enjoy this piece but in the coming chapter there are definitely some things you can do to improve your writing. Don't get me wrong, this ...
Jan 3, 2013 -
Re: Roulette
Hey ROD, I like the intense way you describe what's going on in this story, but there is some room for improvement in how you help convey what's happening to ...
Jan 1, 2013 -
Re: Diary of an African Teen: Christmas Preparations
Hi Gaiya! I'm Scout :) This is really interesting, and like Mia Paramore, I was really intrigued to know more about Africa! You only have a little so far (I ...
Dec 31, 2012 -
Re: You Can't Imagine
Hi Munchkin, I liked the way this piece was put together, and I also have some helpful critiques. First of all, the plot line was interesting, but I do have ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Nellie
Hello Lady Purple! This is thematically an okay piece, but you need to do more! Right now you have more of a vignette than a short story, so expand on ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: The Shadow
Its a horror story alright, a little gruesome and gory but pretty well done. You have some good visions, but a tough time making them realistic and come out sounding ...
Dec 29, 2012 -
Re: A beginning to an end.
Hi brokenmemo, I have to agree in that this is a really cool idea, but I hate to say that the whole "kept in a laboratory by evil men and ...
Dec 29, 2012 -
Re: Guardian Angel
Hello Angel, This work was great! I liked the length, the tone and style, and the overall rhythm of the piece. Maybe think of adding a little more about your ...
Dec 29, 2012 -
Re: Pitty not those lost in the Dragon's cave.
I really did enjoy the perspective you took up in this piece. It is very rare and unique to write from the point of view of the typical antagonist in ...
Dec 28, 2012 -
Re: The Plague of Humanity
Hi Marbel, I did enjoy this story but I have to agree with Lycando that it is a little unoriginal. However, you did a good job anyway. I loved the ...
Dec 28, 2012