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Re: The Dark Shadow
Hey, I know this is your first post but i'm going to honest with you, okay? Well my first point would have to be it is a little short. Most ...
Dec 1, 2010 -
Re: Realized
Hey! I am here as requested. It was a short poem, which was good, but, with a little more length it could be a long poem which is great. First ...
Nov 30, 2010 -
Re: A Depressed God
Hey, Poems about od I love especially in this contest,however, there is something that bothers me about it, but I don't know what. I think it could be the actual ...
Nov 27, 2010 -
Re: Bouquet of Bruises
Hello! I am here as requested! I can see your problem and I do think more emotion is needed as at the moment all we have is visual imagery(I will ...
Nov 22, 2010 -
Re: An Ode to...
Hello my dear! I would not scrap it, but as you say it does need changed. My problem with the piece is the way you have started each stanza. It ...
Nov 17, 2010 -
Re: God's Tuesdays [1]
hello! This was really good. I shall give my negatives first. Mrs V. I would change her name, it just doesn't sound right for the character portrayed. When he goes ...
Nov 13, 2010 -
Re: Please God
Hey, In terms of how this was written and the content it was really really god, so I plaude you there. However, I feel like this is in the wrong ...
Nov 13, 2010 -
Re: You are music
Hey, This poem, wasn't really a poem. It was a list. And didn't really have much to it. . . . I think you need to go through it and ...
Nov 12, 2010 -
Re: Not Here
Hey, I couldn't find any major flaw other than in the first two or three paragraphs a little more emotion to back up the visual would be excellent. I think ...
Nov 8, 2010 -
Re: Taped Piano Keys
Hello, Well first let me give you my interpertation; I felt like that this was a memory of a woman when she was a child and I felt like the ...
Nov 8, 2010 -
Re: The Play of Life
Like others have said I share thie r points. My only other nit pick would be the first two lines contradict each other. The stage isn't classed as set if ...
Nov 7, 2010 -
Re: Write What You Know
As a rule I do not like the genre but I have to say this is amazing. I loved gthe opening as it was simply put and almost child like ...
Nov 6, 2010 -
Re: What if??
Helo :) First off Welcome to YWS. Secondly, this kinda is not a poem. So I can not review it as one, however I shall contemplate it as another matter ...
Nov 6, 2010 -
Re: I Am Me
Hello, I am here as requested. I am sorry to say i can not offer anything more than what has been said. If I was to give you a review ...
Oct 29, 2010 -
Re: Husk - A Poem About a Dead Friend
Hey, Everyone has focused on the positives of the poem, however it is not perfect so I will try and offer a critque you can build on. Overnight your canine ...
Oct 29, 2010
