lilymoore

Here's the goofed up parts, they should be un-goofed up now. I stared at her, eyes going wide, %u201CToday%u2019s the New Year Ball, isn%u2019t it?%u201D Why is she asking this? ...

The end of that got cut off for some reason. Weird. But I was going to say that the imagery in these two lines give the biggest punch in the ...

Hey there, Joshua. Well, since this seems pretty important to you, I’ll cut all the chit chat and just get straight to the review. Anyways, here are some nitpicks. She ...

These are mega win! The only thing I could really say is that I had some trouble reading the fonts for Lava's and Lauren's. But that might just be me ...

Topic locked.

Seven and Eight Baby!!! IDUN You might be surprised. Eat up, and we'll be off- you're going home today. I’m confused, mainly by the idea of her being surprised. Why? ...

Parts Four, Five, and Six! There isn’t much I can say about part four right now except I was wondering how it is she got from the window to the ...

Whoot! Part three! (also just realized that these were all posted in the same thread...) SOPHIE (As she's being led away) I don't like going to the dentist. This dialogue ...

I’m baaack. GWENDOLYN Yes, Aunt. Something about this response sounds uncomfortable and not as natural as everything else so some more thought might want to go into this. The same ...

Okay, I figured I would answer a few questions that were brought up. Sassykat and FireandIce326 – As far as the capitalization goes, it was intentional. I’m not sure why ...

Well, Pingun, I’m back…again. :D I gravitated naturally towards Luke as I knew Lucy had a crush on Jack but he kept dancing up next to me. I kept telling ...

Hi there Chequita. I’m here ‘cause, well, you ask! :D Okay, it’s a little hard, without the original, to make a lot of comparisons, and I’m working mostly off of ...

Well, grigoris, I’ve never double reviewed anything! That means you’re the firstest! They might also be yellow,Like the eternal gaze Okay, watch your capitalizing and spacing here between ‘yello

First of all, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for their comments and maybe comment on a few things myself. I like what she says about beautiful ...