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jojo48

  • Other » General, General Re: First Chair

    Now the main reason this was great was because of its view point. Normally I'm not one for letters, but this was executed with a sort of grace. That is, ...

    Oct 10, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Saving Lilly~New Chapter Three

    It's a short excerpt. I'd love to hear more. I haven't read the previous chapters, so I may not be the best reviewer for this. But I noticed how the ...

    Aug 24, 2010
  • Short Story » Historical Fiction, General Re: Number Ninety six Part I

    Two lovers parted by war is a very moving idea. And I like how you switched between views using the letters as a sort of bridge, if you will. But ...

    Aug 24, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Balema

    I like this story, and I would be interested to see how Sam dissapeared and what happened to her. But first off, I believe you should make your first part ...

    May 8, 2010
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: The Wings of Icarus

    Oh man, I LOVE that idea!!! You have a great base for a story going there. Greek mythology can always be a good place to start. The only thing I ...

    May 8, 2010
  • Short Story » Action / Adventure, General Re: The Necklace

    It's good, but the ending's a little too abrupt. Short stories still have to have spunk no matter how short they are, and this one's a bit deflated. One thing ...

    May 7, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, General Re: BURN. Chpater 1

    Okay. Great beginning, but if this is really chapter one, then I'm a bit confused. First of, I do get the air the Cecilia is the hero of this story ...

    Apr 28, 2010
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Play to Win

    Great beginning. You should continue if you've got a story in mind that you like. There's one thing I'm absolutely sure about. You want us to know the place is ...

    Feb 6, 2010
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Day the Plum flowers bloomed

    The first thing I noticed about this marvelous draft was how affectively it pulled me in. I began reading and immediately got that sense of eerie foreboding that snagged my ...

    Jan 30, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Baroque Style, 2/2 Time

    The first thing I noticed about the meaning of this poem was that it seemed like one person had all the technical stuff and the other had the musicality. I ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Storm

    Great imagery, and it makes me want to know what happens next. But it sounds more like the prologue of a book rather than a poem. If you would like ...

    Oct 9, 2009
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: No title yet... reviews appreciated

    The snag at the end definately caught my attention, and it sounds like you have a pretty unique story there, but it was just a little too much. It reminded ...

    Sep 18, 2009
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Elements: Secrets of the River (Prologue)

    That was a perfect prologue. I was completely into it and the scene filled my head the whole time. That only happens to me when I'm reading something by a ...

    Sep 17, 2009
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Trees

    First of all TexanWriter, I know a lot of nice prose poems don't have a clear meaning, but this one just seemed a bit like blabbering. You should define the ...

    Sep 15, 2009
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Glimmer

    This was a pretty good begining. There are just a few thing you could change. First off, you spend too much time describing the characters. We don't need to hear ...

    Sep 15, 2009


In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.
— Robert Frost