hekategirl

This poem was good! some points however: You still leave the cap off the toothpaste. Always. Squeezing from the top so that the tube mangles, Into a wasteful mess. We ...

I enjoyed this :D But, there was so much going on I had a hard time keeping up. First she's rowing, then she's a prostitute, then she's rowing, then she ...

This is exactly how I imagine a Prologue to be, the set-up for the story, the backround. It written very well for what it was. A few points however: King ...

I like it! but how could I not? everything you write is brilliant :wink: But a few things... William was eating lunch when he died. I don't know why but ...

I really liked this! it had beautiful rhythm and the rhymes were flawless. I do think you should break it up differently though. Maybe something like this: I hold in ...

I see a good story brewing :D But, I had a really big problem with the whole piece. You TOLD us what was happening the entire time. You never SHOWED ...

Nice article! It was short but it got to the point. The only problem is (Yes, I know It's an article but...) it seemed really bland, like really bland. At ...

This poem was short and sweet. I noticed you were trying to accomplish flow and sometimes it worked but other times the lines stuck out like sore thumbs. Like here: ...

I don't know quite what to think of this poem. It was didn't really do much for me. I won’t say if you do, or I hope you will I ...

To answer your questions: 1) What do you think? Any good? Yes, it was good but... 2) a. If this was the beginning of a novel, would you find yourself ...

That was wonderful! Every stanza flowed seamlessly with the next. You created lots of great images to convey your point. You definitely showed and didn't tell. These faucets have broken ...

I liked this poem, it was interestingly crafted. Some points though: I am still your little girl but i am growing older i am still your girl but i am ...

It was a cute idea but, trying not too sound harsh, it honestly bored me to tears. It was long, rambling, had no rhythm, no imagery to speak of...there's no ...

Hello! I see you're a new member so I would like to say Welcome! but here at YWS you need to post a couple of reviews before a posting your ...

This is a beautiful poem, sweet and delicate like the butterfly you were describing. I shall now commence to break it down and nit-pick! bwahahaha! A speck of color Sits ...