grimy89098

i hav to agree with the message of it. maybe its just my school... but the new principal this year is taking our freedom of speech and freedom to wear ...

ahh, my favourite subject... Seems like just about every other day she's breaking down nowhere to be found pushed up against the wall slowly losing it all she wonder's what ...

and crouched in a defensive position i know you didnt want detailed critiques but i just wanted to point this out try: "and crouched defensively" sorry, couldn't help myself, thought ...

very nice, loved this one. just a few things ill point out: My heart flutters with the beat of one hundred drums. try loosen up the words a bit, try ...

i liked it, bit confusing at times, but that might just be my simple mind... ;) the vocab perhaps could using some fleshing out, but its good how it is ...

um, i forgot what eloping means so i cant give you a good review but i liked it anyway, the ending was good, nearly laughed and i love the whole ...

cool poem, even though im not religious and this poem has quite a bit of religious links, i liked most of it the vocab you use is cool, and how ...

Try to stay away from cliches like time rushing by. I don't think there is any need for blatant lines like "what has happened to humanity?" By writing this poem ...

wow, that's a good one... you've got good talent, plz dont be discouraged by my comments :wink: oh yeh, here at YWS we have this rule about how many reviews ...

good read, although i noticed some things that could use improving plz dont take this the wrong way, just trying to help Mrs. Mapletree didn't like late people like the ...

which told him in no uncertain terms that his body weight was far more then the old beams could handle I first thought this sounded kinda wierd, "in no uncertain ...

“A women was murdered in the marketplace, I was nearby so they decided to blame me.” He grunted. women is the plural, so (unless you mean a two or more ...

disturbing yet intriguing the silver substance, is it oil? or some other substance? maybe some more description on his surroundings and the hole would be nice, and a name other ...

ok, first of all, great story, reminds me of the way i sometimes write second, this is for all the people who suggested the changes (the term has eluded me...) ...

Robert wasn’t sure about what he should say just looked at his wife. needs a comma here: Robert wasn’t sure about what he should say, just looked at his wife. ...