girlwithquestions

Very interesting! I'd like to start out that even though you're going with the popular "vampire and werewolf" theme, you've put an intriguing spin on it with the whole Creatures ...

Wow. This is really really REALLY intriguing. And it definitely starts out with the right amount of "umph" to actually keep the interest of the reader past the first few ...

Alright. =] Over all, it was pretty good! It seemed to move a bit fast. Like, after one day, this girl is already in love with Cassius. At least she ...

I thought this was absolutely brilliant. When i first read how you were trying to make the character childish, but still adult like in a way, I was thinking...."What?" But ...

Wow. This is an action packed story, most definitely. For starters, I thought you could've put more information into the story. Who was Tom? I didn't really get that. And ...

Hey, I'll be reviewing your story today! So, I thought over all, it was okay. Prologues usually are written in a very mysterious way, that leaves the reader wanting more, ...

Hello! I'm going to be you're reviewer today. =] To start off, this seems like the start of a fairy tale! I'm intrigued! But, to get into the more critique-ish ...

This was pretty interesting! The only thing is that you repeat yourself and say the same thing in a number of different sentences. It does set the mood, though. Over ...

Alright. First I'm gonna say I'm sorry, because I realized that when Renee was put into her cell, it was dark, and she probably couldn't have seen Will. And that's ...

I agree with cjscoot. I got kind of confused, because when I first started reading, I thought it was taking place in medieval time periods, hence the jail thing. And ...

This is really good! I liked it even better than the first chapter!! When you had written, "Holy shit!" I said releasing my anger to the world. Two old women ...

That was a good start! As i was reading it, I was like...wait, this sounds like a Disney movie I've seen before. And then you said that at the bottom ...

Hmmm. This sounds like it will turn into a really good story. I liked how you put that the Becca girl was dead, and then all of a sudden she ...

This sounds interesting! I'm wondering what the ''incident'' is....? You should keep going, and develop your story! Don't forget to check over some of your grammar errors, such as the ...

pretty good! this is a prologue, so it makes sense on how things aren't exactly clear yet. At first i was thinking, maybe add some more background on the characters ...