foxfire

i really like it, the story is fast pace and there is a sense of thriller especcialy at the end of the story. you have kept information to a proper ...

wow, the prologue is poetic especcially in the first sentence. that truly caught me but as for the otehr parts, to be honest, it is a bit confusing for me. ...

my first thing i need to comment is that you must not say anything about your story. you must not tell the reader that this character will appear later becasue ...

okay my comment to thsi story is that the first part where she is crying is still a blur. the reader does not know why she is crying unless youa ...

my comment is that it is very poetic. i like the way you combine simple sentences to make on big paragraph. you have use a lot of metaphors and questions ...

the story was basically good... i like the dialogue in the second part and the description in teh first. Only God knows how much time passed before I came out ...

i love it. the story is beautiful... the plot of thes tory is simple but effective Karen bit her lip. It seemed her homeroom teacher was also the creative writing ...

Hey, i like the plot, it is much better than the last time. i can tell that the mistakes you ahd amde were all cleared out. you did well for ...

i like the story and the ending is good. That is what i call suspense the only thing that confuse me is how you change the setting from the field ...

Okay ... i know that you are trying to make the reader understand more about Lilian but it woudl be better if you give a short descirption maybe tell the ...

to be honest, i find the story a bit confusing... first of all, if Reverie is different from earth, how is it different. I know that each people have orbs ...

this is such a long story... really long... i am wondering if you could have make it short and seperate tehs tory into two parts so that it can give ...

Good story but it is simply confusing with the horizontal lines...i cannot find the line i am reading... That was the only thing i think is wrong becasue it is ...

The story is okay and i like the descriptions and adjectives being written on the story. I like the quotation: She has never slept. She has never dreamt. She can ...

All in all, the story is good but i kept wondering on why the main character is going to the house. You made good description on telling the events before ...