fatimachan

i love Rasulullah! :D the people did find in him a hero, good job. ;)

love the first stanza, a great start! but in the second stanza i agree with nightowl, the word "crappy" sounded kind of odd... like, comedic when it wasn't supposed to. ...

Hey there! I read this beautiful poem and only one " nit-pick"(lol first time using that word) stuck out to me. Her pain [s]was[/s] locked behind the empty shell of ...

found one oddity I didn't know who had called the ambulance but whoever it was were not in my good books. I think there should be a comma after ambulance ...

Their true, at least some of the time anyways. How would I know? I was one of those babies. the "how would i know?" seems sort of cliche to me. ...

"Is that her?" you write this twice at the beginning. Which confuses me for some reason. are we supposed to know her? or be looking for someone in the forest ...

on the down side: I think you might have repeated words a little too much. and it seemed to be repetitive. But there was also good repetition, like the repetition ...

wow. just wow! This poem is just great. I think many people could relate to this. That feeling of never able to succeed, or never being accepted, or not being ...

throughout the whole bit i only caught one mistake. "I've always wanted to become a nudist. Those people who are just look so open, and free, and it seems like ...

@Meep Yeah I noticed the Y missing at the end of "ever" also. And there were a couple other words that had missing letters, but I cant seem to find ...

I agree with el Arma Escrita, the number of characters at the very beginning is overwhelming and somewhat confusing. I see that you wanted us to know a little about ...

wow. I love how you added the surprise element at the end. I really wasn't expecting him to be the one that caused her to be in that state. "A ...

Oh, wow, Danny sounds really handsome. haha. I love your humor its so funny. Favorite part: "I'm looking outside my window at the moment and I can see Mrs.Morris's devil ...

wooooow! This piece is amazing, the words you use to describe are so descriptive. The poem flows, there is not one break! It is nice to see how you've grown ...

The theme reminds me of books i've read. With the main character confused at whats going on. saddened by reality. confused by the fake smiles and laughter. I noticed one ...