-
Re: The Possession
Good, good. This is good! Please write more of it soon. I'm really excited to know who "he" is... so suspenseful.
Aug 9, 2008 -
Re: In the Deep Blue - Prologue (Edited)
This was great. It really made me feel horrible for the main character. You did a great job with showing relationships. Read through it once aloud on your own, though. ...
Jul 4, 2008 -
Re: The Missing Part (Part 1)
Good job! Great job at letting us get to know the character. Honestly, my favorite line was "Joseph has shit tickets for a tail!" Cannot wait for the next chapter.
Jun 22, 2008 -
Re: Flemzo's Exhilarating Monotony Contest: Breakfast
This was great! I loved how you made something so simple so complicated and excited! Awesome work. It definitely deserves the place it got! Awesome!
Jun 5, 2008 -
Re: I Know
I think this is something you should work on developing this more. Even though it was and assignment, it has the potential to become a real and engaging poem. Develop ...
Jun 5, 2008 -
Re: Reason for Rebellion
hey, good job. I liked this a lot. I would suggest adding another line to the last stanza, though. It seemed incomplete and did not follow the pattern of the ...
Jun 4, 2008 -
Re: Fate Calling
Very good. I thought it was written very nicely and descriptively. I was able to picture Alice sitting there in her button-up red cotton dress impatiently waiting for Jasper. So ...
Jun 4, 2008 -
Re: My Master, my Lover.
Woah! That was the best thing I have read on YWS. That was so good! Great, great, great job! Are you going to continue writing this or was it a ...
Apr 30, 2008 -
Re: For you were and will always be
I loved this! I think your friend is going to absolutely bawl when they read this. Great job.
Apr 27, 2008 -
Re: Upon that Meadow
That was sad, and yet very uplifting. It was great how it ended in acceptance and love. The contrast between the fear from the dream and the memories shared was ...
Mar 24, 2008 -
Re: Guitar at Midnight
That was really great. I loved the passion and longing you put into it. It sounded very professional - as a poem goes - and was well put together.
Mar 22, 2008 -
Re: Sea Spray
Thank you all for the wonderful reviews! I am in the process of changing it.
Mar 22, 2008 -
Re: Vivid
It was simple and short, but it was striking. I love the contrast between "night" and "blazing by." The only improvement is that it could be longer.
Mar 21, 2008
