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ccwritingrainbow

  • Poetry » Realistic, Satire Re: Titor, John.

    This poem is pretty sad to me. You chose words like "roadkill," "hastily," and "dead," and what can I say? I have the chills just thinking about this. And I ...

    Jul 13, 2015
  • Short Story » Narrative, General Re: Tragedy

    I thought this story had full potential. I believe that this is a draft because I found many mistakes that you would have to fix. My dream was dull with ...

    Mar 27, 2015
  • Short Story » Dramatic, Health Re: Clocks

    I loved this story because of the build up. The more you used the tick tocks, the more my heart raced to find out what happened next. This is a ...

    Mar 27, 2015
  • Poetry » Romantic, General Re: The Rest of My Days

    This poem just described everything I felt when I was with my exboyfriend. I feel that way with a certain crush I have now. I mean we all have those ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Poetry » General, Dramatic Re: L'appel du vide

    The poem completely matches the title of the poem, especially when you put the title in a different language. I just love how you describe what being in this void ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Novel / Chapter » Supernatural, Teen Fiction Re: Black Fire - Prologue

    "Jenna," Lizzy said, closing her notes and getting up. At her words, Lizzy thew a glance... "No idea," Lizzy mouthed back. ...the door, and just as she reached the threshold, ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Short Story » Science Fiction, Fantasy Re: Dystopian Prince - Chapter 1

    "12" is twelve Father refused to take the gun, and Uncle grew angry. The blood rushed from Father's face, and he hastily lifted two pistols. "24" is twenty-four. "1" is ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Novel / Chapter » Teen Fiction, Action / Adventure Re: The Clepsydra: Chapter 1- Disappearance of Normality

    Once my eyes have adjusted to the bright rays, I notice that the sun is coming... Lying next to me, I notice a young girl a bit older than me, ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Novel / Chapter » Other, Other Re: Words I am Missing

    Life at Eighteen: I wish that this poem could be in stanza format instead of this paragraph. I feel as if the pauses are not meant for paragraphs but separate ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Poetry » Dramatic, Narrative Re: Eyes on ice

    she lays on the ground "Help me," she says "Please," she pleads I only found those few errors. Poetry doesn't usually have grammar errors, but this made me want to ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Short Story » Dramatic, Narrative Re: A God's Eyes

    This looks like a good piece. What I highly recommend more than anything is to make more paragraphs. If you keep a piece this long at one paragraph, people are ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Novel / Chapter » Realistic, General Re: Silver Lining - Chapter 1

    school campus with her mom at her side and a big, chocolate brown dog next... that said, 'Service Dog. Do Not Pet." me a question, and instead, I waved him ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Short Story » General, General Re: The Alien in the Trash Can

    This story was very entertaining. I enjoyed the little laugh. I just thought that sometimes Beety spoke too maturely when it came to telling a story to little kids. I'll ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Poetry » Satire, Romantic Re: Love (Through the Eyes of a Gamer)

    I am a video gamer myself, and I understood every reference to this poem completely. As a gamer, I loved how you put the gaming elements into something universal such ...

    Mar 26, 2015
  • Poetry » Narrative, Literature Re: Grace in Diction

    This is a very thought out, short essay you have here. If you had to do this for a class assignment, I hope you did a very good job on ...

    Mar 26, 2015


My one true aspiration in life is to make it into the quote gen.
— avianwings47