bubblewrapped

First of all, like I said -- I really like this. It does have a very Russian flavour, actually (not that I would know), and I liked Lev as a ...

Snoinkus! More poetry? Excellent ^_^ If there was time-traveling, this is it fingers traveling over embossed letters on cheap hallmark cards -- Christmas has come, rejoice! And in the corner ...

Well....that was interesting, I guess. A few suggestions: The the skeleton swings From the gnarled tree Black against the moonlight Swinging from it's twisted gallows Creaking as the chill winds ...

Um. Wah-huh? Sorry, but this made no sense to me. First, you say that age is not death. Right. But then you say, it is growth, only growth is not ...

I suppose I'll take liberties and disagree with Crysi in a few places here, LOL. I did like this. You have, as I said, a gift for simile (yeah, the ...

OMG! So sweet! ... um. Yes. Fortunately, I am notoriously cruel, so I am still able to critique L:DL Lucia wrinkled up her nose. He was ugly. His hair was ...

How do you punctuate poetry? The secret, I think (although I know very little about it, really) is to read it. And then see where your natural pauses are, where ...

**blinks** I kinda like it, and I kinda dont, LOL. The rhyme scheme and rhythm seem a bit stilted; on the other hand, they lend a unique flavour to the ...

Snoinkles! I love it! **steals poem** No, but seriously. It's short, it's sweet, and it is definitely metaphorical - to me, anyway :lol: If I were you, I'd think about ...

Aloha Jiggy, Not sure where to put this - I can never really figure out the difference between the categories, to be honest :oops: :lol: I think it will do ...

I like it, as I said. The beginning especially is well done. One thing that bugged me throughout though - too many commas! You're always using commas before speech when ...

Hmm. I liked it, but there were parts that bothered me. Namely, the entire first two stanzas. IMHO, these are unnecessary exposition. You could dump them both without really injuring ...

For the first time in quite a long time, I can sincerely say that I have no real critique for you. This was beautiful -- definitely on my Top Ten ...

Hey LL! Nice to see some of your work at last :D I second most of what cadmium said about consistency - the stanzas arent very well connected, so I'd ...

Take a bow! No, seriously. Because that is one of the most unique and mature poems I've read from a new member (no offense, anyone, but you gotta agree). Of ...