biancarayne

You say you love me, But they have no value, And you continue to strike. I think maybe you should change the second line to words have no value, because ...

I think if you first figure out if there's a message or not you'll definitely be able to make this even better. If you don't know what you meant by ...

The repetitive parts didn't do this justice at all and kind of sounded like you were repeating the same basic idea over and over again. I think maybe you should ...

This does seem more like a story than a poem would definitely make an awesome, intriguing story, that's for sure! Anyways, there's definitely stuff in here that could use some ...

Bang! The Dumbwaitor shuddered and he tumbled out landing in a heap on the floor. That part bothered me for some reason...I just think usin the word bang is kinda ...

There it was hanging and gliding back and forth , the villain upside down hanging by a single rope that kept him alive. He was high hanging from a sky ...

This does sound kinda like more of a summary than a prologue to me...but it does sound very interesting! the thing about stuff like this is that star wars IS ...

A field of wet, red poppies, All glistening in the sun. Some women pick as trophies But it isn’t just for fun. It doesn't sound quite right the way it ...

nd I’ll cover Super Boy with every fiber of my bean. bean should be being...unless, u meant to put bean for some reason i didn't catch on to. Anyways, the ...

"To any passerby it would be a highly irregular sight that came to your eyes." I believe, though I'm not sure why exactly it would be their instead of your ...

Some of the imagery in this...no, all I think, was absolutely brilliant and creative in my opinion. However, I find the large words to be completely unnecessary as that does ...

I'm not sure the reptition in this really works all that well...and also, the last line really didn't make much sense at all, but of course that might be my ...

The beginning kind of seemed like it began in the middle of a sentence, like there should be more there that isn't...also, I think maybe you should expand on the ...

I like this poem because it's brief and yet the emotions in it are very strong. The way you begin it was very intriguing to me and made me want ...

This is definitely a very creative poem. However, I'm not sure why a change in thoughts would have things popping, though that might just be me. Also, the way you ...