abbisnail

ok. my first post was about the beginning of the poem. being the grammar freak that i am, i have to call you on the "why don't it rain...". i ...

Welcome to YWS! i didn't get to read the whole story but i liked the first bit. i'm gonna come back later and finish it but so far, nice job!

I liked this a lot, but i might change the "If only I had a wish" to "If only i had one wish" or something a little more definite and ...

i like the idea but the poem itself is so-so. there was a lot of forced rhyme and some parts were really repetitive. you might want to just go through ...

ok, i'll take out the part about the laptop but NOT the cat. the cat must stay!!! =] thanks for the input though.

how about this: my gag reflex is taking over because this poem sucks. i think that you should burn it; and you will, with any luck. all the besties, ~abby~

hmmm...i wasn't too impressed with this. angels of death? perhaps some more creativity would help... ~abby~

i really enjoyed reading this post. however, i would like to point out that if you were sticking to shakespearean sonnet guidelines, you might want to rework some of the ...

awww crud. cafe boy's words are supposed to be italicized but it didn't do it when i copy/pasted. just imagine it =]

i really liked this. i know other posts told you to expand and stuff and you might want to do that a little bit but i would encourage you to ...

you obviously tried to write a good poem but i found it incredibly cliche and not well thought out. i guess if it was done really really really well, the ...

hmmm. good ideas. i enjoyed your vibrant discriptions but, i have to say, i strongly discourage the use of exclaimation points. a good writer and poet should be able to ...