TheHiddenMask

Well written, I enjoyed reading it.

I like the lay out along with the meaning behind it, the story has a real good feel to it and went pretty smoothly. I enjoyed it!

I would suggest maybe working on the flow of this, it seems a little stressed and put together to me. Try to give it more of smooth lay out maybe.

It was a good base line I think, but maybe go back and add some detail to give us more of a wider picture to make this more interesting.

Wow. That's all I can seem to say, I could really feel the depth behind the words in this story and it touched me along with many others I am ...