SushiSashimi333

Hey! Here for the review as requested ^_^ I'm normally more of a fantasy writer, but I'll do my best to make this review helpful! Your story starts off fairly ...

Your introduction is a little too straight forward. The voice you put into it of the main character was good, but it tells too much instead of "showing". You describe ...

Hey! Here for the review! I really hope you find this helpful. Okay, so first I must start off that I am a major fan of prologues, especially short ones. ...

Hey! Sushi here as requested ^_^ I hope this review helps you! So I noticed in here that you have a lot of grammar mistakes. Sometimes you capitalize letters that ...

Hey! You got a silver medal! Yay! So you can choose between 2 choice reviews or points. Here's the review for your piece. I really loved the way you incorporated ...

Hai Kobita! Here as requested. Sorry it took so long, hopefully this review will be worth it ^_^ Intro: Your first line was very eye catching. This is good because ...

Okay, as you probably know I haven't read your previous chapters, but I hope this review will help just as much. I may ask some questions just to fill in ...

Well this was certainly interesting! It makes the reader want to know more about what they need to tell everyone. It certainly does make for an exciting beginning. But there ...

Back again for yet another review! I'm just gonna review as I read to make things easier on me. I feel that the transition between the first and second paragraph ...

I gotta say that I absolutely loved this! Your very first line was a single sentence, but it really set the mood for the entire thing. It gave me a ...

Wow! That's all I can really say. Your style had me captivated from the beginning that I had to skim so that I knew what was happening. Along with your ...

Hey! Sushi here for a review. Hope this helps ^_^ Your plot was definitely interesting. It shows a vague conflict but I feel like that could be clarified a bit. ...

Hey! Sushi here with a review. First I was wondering what this fan fiction was based off of? If I know that might help me understand a little better in ...

Hey! Here for a review from the contest. Hopefully this will be helpful to you ^_^ You had "Counting Stars" and I must say I really like how you incorporated ...

Heyo! Sushi here to review as requested. I hope that this helps you ^_^ So first onto your characters. The main character really seems to have a stable personality, it ...