Snoink

Hahah! I wouldn't quite call this poem innocent, actually. For one, the actual story between Jack and Jill has to do with the French revolution and the beheadings of the ...

Hey Benway! Okay, so I loved your poem. It kind of reminds me of "This Is Just To Say" by William Carlos Williams in its apparent simplicity in a common ...

Hi Hayden! I know this is going to sound awful, but I would really like to see this piece expanded on a bit. For example, as it is, there is ...

So! First of all, you are going to want to use spell check on this. There are a lot of spelling errors that can be easily found with spell check. ...

¡Oy vey! Solv, I love you, but I worry about your English essays! :P Knowledge is one of the most important things in life; it's the key for humans to ...

Hey sassycat! I realize that you probably had limitations from the contest and everything, but reading this with no context as to what this contest was, I have absolutely no ...

Hey Wolfdra! :) Maybe the reason why you have writer's block is because you don't really care to go further in your stories? I mean, I read your story and ...

Hahaha. This story, actually, is a perfect example of Mary Sue/Gary Stu syndrome. I am going to have to quote this for future critiques of mine! After all, sometimes this ...

You're a star! Anyway, a grammatical nitpick: "...say her daughter won’t be going out alone any more."

Hi Kattie! :) A couple things struck me when I was reading your poem! For one, there is a mention of love and losing someone through disinterest (or at least ...

This story is so sad! :( A couple of things... I think you could have drawn out this story a lot more. It seemed really quick and rushed through... not ...

Haha! I love the author commentary. I wish you had more of it and that you didn't hide it away. It was really one of the funniest parts of the ...

Aw, these poems are so cute! I prefer the second one, just because it pretty much oozes tranquility. And, in a philosophical sense, it's more interesting as well. After all... ...

Remember is right! I have a reputation of not liking adverbs. xD Anyway, this was really cute! I like the weird stories that the father/daughter team made up. My dad ...

Aww! I hope he defeats the illness! I love how you made the poem start with the grim and end with the hopeful. As far as the last stanza? Well... ...