Snoink

This was beyond words - it was magic born in letters. I love your poetry and I can never think of anything good to say: just know I read every ...

until you only said things that made no sense (emotions echoed still in the silence). These lines sounded a little awkward... I think it's the "made no sense." It sounds ...

Nobody posted on this...? Well, I'll be the first then. First of all, this had a lot of dialogue. Dialogue is used to move the story and make it interesting. ...

The lines felt fragmented, but I think that helped you more. Instead of it flowing smoothly, painting a distinct picture, it ended up being jerky -- perfect for a puzzle. ...

I liked the poem, even though it probably was extremely clichéd, etc., etc. Why? Because it reminded me of my childhood. You see, when I was little, I thought that ...

Hehe! Just read it (finally) and I liked it. :D There were some grammatical errors in it, but I've gone over those grammar errors in several of your stories and ...

I have to agree with the others. It's not really the rhyme that gets me, but the lack of startling imagery. For example, I could write something like: "Tears cascaded ...

Copy and paste this onto your first entry: Even though the cruel winds of the spring-tide have subsided, the merciless waves of the angered sea have not yet receded. The ...

I don't really have anything to comment, except that I think it's simplistically really good. It's said in such an innocent way that it sticks to your mind a lot ...

For the first chapter, (I think it's a chapter) the writing dances . Which, between you and me, is a very good thing because it makes it that much more ...

Iris is sitting there, waiting. Waiting for the skies to burst relentlessly upon her, to drown her, waiting for the wind spirits to engulf her, take her along with them. ...

Haha, very catchy too! :D Just one nitpick: "We can drug the wine to lull them to a deep dreamless sleep" I would rather see them broken apart like: "We ...

Oh, this is a nice essay. It was, in every respect, delightful to read. The research you did sounded quite thorough and the points you brought up were well thought ...

Begging helps! Or embarrassing Snoinky into seeing it again. ;) Anyway, the story is "AWWWWWWWWWWWW"-ish. If you know what I mean. Nice short little thingy. "Mark, your gonna make me ...

Grammar check for the first paragraph! Her arms were crossed and the red satin gown she was in wrinkled. I would prefer: "Her arms were crossed and her red satin ...