ShortBus

Thanks for your review. The part where it's "a bubbling sound" and whatnot are in italics. I'm not sure if that made it through when I pasted it here. I ...

Thanks. %u263A You helped immensely. And chapter two is coming soon. %u263A I'll let you know when it's posted.

Thanks for the review. Timing has a lot to do with comedy. Some comedians are slow and drawn out, as others are always in rapid fire mode. For the time ...

Thanks for your review.%u263A It actually came from a script a wrote a while back. This whole story revolves from that idea. The big dialogue part was almost copied and ...

Hey thanks. :) That's pretty much exactly what I was going for. The vulgarity is pretty over the top, but it's on purpose. Even though all the names and jokes ...

Hey, thanks! That was some really good information you gave me. I honestly had no idea what I was doing. I'm glad you dissected the whole thing. You pointed out ...

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it. I really have no idea what I'm doing. I'll learn about line schemes and some of the poetry lingo as I go. Your right ...

Good job with the visualization. The flow of the poem worked well also. I really can't comment on the structure of your poem. I'm not sure if there even is ...

The Hero 1,2,3 names might be a little disorienting. Sorry. I never even bothered to give them any sort of names. This was all, kind of, "on the fly".

Hey, thanks Mori. I only had 10 minutes to write this and I didn't have time to correct any grammar mistakes. I basically got two random words, "cheese", and "tree" ...