Shadowsun

I've read most of the Terry Pratchett books and have really enjoyed them. My favourites would be the ones with Sam Vimes in. He is my favourite character in the ...

Whens the next bit? I really want to know what happens next! Please! Tell me! Anyways. I can't find anything wrong with it. ~ Shadowsun :D

Ah... I feel sorry for Kai, he's practically lost verything hasn't he? Anyway, I can't find anything wrong with it apart from: They shot another bolt into his chest, but ...

Well, since you asked. It's very good, I can find very little wrong with it, and the ending was fantastic! Although, you don't tell us what he's thinking and feeling ...

Ooo! Dragons! Nothing is complete without them :D. Apart from the little typos it's really good! ~ Shadowsun :D

Ooo. Mercenarys with wings, very new idea. Origional :D. Apart from the typo problem everyone else has mentioned it's really good. ~ Shadowsun :D

I can only echo what everyone else has said. The first bit needs changing because it's a bit rushed and the story is a bit short but overall it is ...

I said I would, so I will. It's not like any other piece of poetry I've read so I like it. It's origional and unique. :) That's good. I can't ...

Blue = Change Green = Suggestion It grabbed the gun and began to shoot across the Running soldiers Get rid of the capital Doesn't sound right. add an 'at' so ...

:D Thats BRILLIANT!!! :D ~ Shadowsun :D

Okay, I like this, but there is a general lack of description. Why use 'A image of a young man in his early twenties appeared.' when you can use, 'An ...

Kalyee flew with me to the ground nest and then left without even looking at me. I raised an eyebrow at her back but then shook my head and walked ...

I was now the strongest in the clan, it was even suggested that I was the strongest Iriad in the world. I did not think that this was true, but ...

Great story, I'm looking forward to reading the second part in a second. You made me feel really sad for Fin but curious about everything else, what species are they? ...

I felt really sorry for Corrie at first, but the last bit made me think that she was creepy. I kinda feel sorry for the narrator for having to put ...