Rydia

This poem is rather deep but, at times, your punctuation (or lack of) makes it hard to read and disrupts the flow. Also, the second stanza should start with 'I ...

I liked this, rather dark and mysterious. I do have a few points on grammar though... Like a wisp of smoke , it slipped into the guardroom window, up the ...

I don't think this poem is too bad. I know nothing of the context as I have yet to read the book but I'm intrigued so you must have done ...

A few specific suggestions first and don't feel you have to use them... The sun rose slowly and the light woke Maura from the little rest that she gets. Soon ...

I like this but the ending threw me off a little. I think you should refer to him as a 'beggar' rather than a fool. That description fits him better ...

This was cute but some of your rhymes didn't really work which threw off the rhythm and I'd remove the ending. The poem is rather light hearted and fun until ...

I have to admit that it was rather unoriginal and the 'three words' theme sort of irked me but the emotions are there and the flow is reasonable. My suggestion ...

Bent, I understood your poem just fine and, as mentioned before, I found it humourous but I agree that it's a little 'wordy.' I wasn't familiar with the term before ...

The rhythm needs a bit of work, as does the rhyme but the content isn't bad. Fairly simplistic but quite nice. Here are some more specific suggestions, use or don't ...

I don't think the rating is required and here's the specific points - around his ankles before leaking it's way slowly until it was in a smoky puddle directly in ...

I like the concept behind this quite a lot and how, the persona's death is her way of killing her sister. I think the beginning could be more interesteing. At ...

I just wanted to make a few specific points before I get on to the general critique... It was called The Death Parlor, and what a fine establishment it was! ...

You have a brilliant sense of humour Snoink and, I think, a deep hatred of physics. If they combine to give this sort of poetry then you should be forced ...

Your rhyme and repetition are pretty much accurate so well done there and I like the reference to Da Vinci, it fits in nicely. I like this poem because it ...

I have to agree that the rhyming is a little off in places but this is a rather funny little poem. I certainly wasn't expecting it to be about cannibalism ...