Rei

I think the best way to describe this, to use theatre language, would be that you've got several beats all rolled into one. This is way to fast. I couldn't ...

It's got some wonderful imagery in it. I like your choice of theme. But it seemed to be missing something. Play around with the idea a little more. Expand on ...

The only thing I didn't like about it was the lack of punctuation and capitalization. To me, it just seems really pretentious and arrogant to not use those, as if ...

Didn't like it. It was way to straight forward. Why put fairy tale in the title if you won't expand on that metephore? Draw on fairy tales to show us ...

It's an okay start. If you really let yourself delve into this it could become a decent story. Give more details. There was not nearly enough to create a good ...

I dunno. I just thought it went way to quickly. Give us time to really get to know your characters. Take your time. The dialogue could be adjusted too, so ...

I've never actually read much of his work, but I loved what little that I have. you know, little bits in anthologies, and things. I think North American culture doesn't ...

Peronally, I think it's way too long a time to go without dialogue. Have stuff happen. Get into the action. Show us that this is what's it's like. Don't just ...

Not bad. Though I didn't really like the "as you need I" part. It just sounded kind of silly. Rhyming poetry is great, but don't sacrifice grammar just to rhyme ...

I liked it, but I would have prefered reading it in first-person rather than third, with no name given. Personally, I find it very rare that when a writer chooses ...

I see one person here has called Shakespeare a copy-cat. Maybe so. Maybe he did borrow ideas and story-lines. But who doesn't? Are the fanatsy novelists who delve into fairy-tales ...

I don't have time for a proper critique. But I did enjoy reading it. Your narrative created a good image in my mind, and I thought the tone was perfect. ...

A decent start. Great imagery. You make it very easy to picture what everything looks like. The only things that really bothered me were in the opening paragraphs. When you ...