Phoenixfire

well the emotion is there, but its more of someone trying to explain how their feeling to someone w/o showing the vulnerability that comes w/ the emotion. Its explaining with ...

I really like the flow and the rhyme. Halfway through I was like, 'wha?' since the doggishness threw me, but this is very good.

Yeah, I was laughing really hard when I wrote it. I actually scared some people with it--apparently they thought I didn't have that kind of stuff in me. :-)

You suck. Seriously. Crap! I never noticed the 'off...off' thing!

You don't want to see the Frodo one. I did it for Sage, she got a chuckle, but it's baaaaad.

Yeah, 'Broken' is in lyric poetry. I love the rhythm of And it all seems so melodramatic Live long and prosper, dude.

You really like it that much, RS? Then take it. Seriously. I spit these things out all the time and then I just can't write any more. My brain is ...

Yes, there was a Poe influence, mostly with the raven theme.

*mutters* that's not all that's alien... sorry, couldn't resist. punctuation is a pain, I know, but for me it's capitalizing the first of every line. Drives me nuts.

The italics thing was a good point, and so was the paragraphing, so I changed it. There's not a lot of details because this was the extent of the thought. ...

For some bizarre reason, this poem made me think of the Peter Pan movie with Robin Williams. If you've seen it, you'll remember when Wendy turned old and Peter came ...

Brava! Poetry about food! Encore! Speaking of, I want dinner. You made me hungry.

love the sentiment. I don't know if I like 'dare I say' at the end, but it might grow on me. good poem.

I've been doing poems more in the style, lately. I love free-form! I really like the imagery and the way it flows. Thumbs up!

Very descriptive. Love it. I myself tend to write dark stuff without thinking about it--and I'm a 'class clown'.