PenguinAttack

Squee! Now, my family thinks I'm somewhat insane because - as you know - I did actually laugh out loud during this. You're a legend and a half. I really, ...

A small trickle of water fell from the gutter along my roof and made a silver trail to the cement below. - Lovely start here. I was watching this from ...

Yay it's another one! I love it. James will be back, right? Of course he will be! Or I shall cry, and I'm sure you're aware of how utterly ick ...

Hello dear! I'm afraid this is going to be a little "brutally honest"... don't take it to heart, though. This is entirely a ceitique of your work, and not your ...

Hi Zo! I like this. To start I saw a ring of text, you know, and I thought it was cute, and considering your title I could see how it ...

Oh, lovely, Sugar. If only for that last little bit, "He was my brother." I love it. As always, I find your description to be fantastic, I think you click ...

Hey there Gadi. Okay, you have some good imagery here, and the sound of it is lovely at times. The main issue, right now, is the structure! Oh dear sweet ...

Squee!! This is even more hilarious than the first, mister minx. Not only that, but you develop characters, keep it interesting and actually have relationships and stuff that you can ...

*finally got round to the actual comment* This makes me so sad, to read. As always you do so well to bring out the right emotion in the right way ...

Hey there. I have to say, I pretty much agree with Suzanne there. There are many different techniques you can use to write a short story, and I applaud you ...

Okay, we've talked about this, but I'm here to give you some hardcopy feedback. ^^ I like the idea and I find the allusion to Icarus,and the religious allusions to ...

Always, my dear, you present a complete view, an image and story in so few words. The imagery is fantastic, you can feel the pulse, and the rhythm wonderfully. I ...

Hi there. First of all, this needs some structure to it. Considering the length of the poem and subject matter it might be nice to see a more structured organisation. ...

Hi there, I can't say I like this at all. You have some lovely imagery in there, and it's used fairly well. But it gets lost will all the other ...

Howdy xanthan gum. ^^ Okay, to start you need to capitalise your lines. Not all of them, just those that would usually need it - start of a new sentence ...