NLPrincess13

Hi, well done on your poem. i like the flow here and the voice in it. very good meaning! though these lines stopped me and it seems good , but ...

HI, first of all well done, it was pretty and simple. i like your pictures a lot and the imagination there is cute. i like sometimes in each stanza. i ...

hi, i can say it's flood of emotion out there, i think you did well. very well actually! i sense a bit dramatic scarcity in the boy tune "the narrator ...

Great!, i am first.... so here my points on the poem Somewhere, life is as perfect i think this line is good but "as" here weaken it. it'd be better ...

i know it's been said before, be careful with your punctuation !! i like the character and how you describe it with flowing over the paragraphs. there still something missing ...

Well done, Cairo i like the flow and its emotions was strong :D i admire the beginning "My life itself has become a chore, In which I'm forced to abandon ...

i like it very much, i enjoyed yes, it's a blessing . i truly love YWS! it's perfect place. i know i wasn't here much, but I'm doing my best ...

Setting up our guns we lie them to bed Using our weapons we made them all fall it stuck the flow, i got the meaning, but you can use better ...

I am with Crescent too! at first i thought he one of those boys then i realized, "Hmmmm, No" any way i love the hospital and sister parts..... very good ...

*raising my hat* :D i loved it, the paragraphs is rich and meaningful. i like it and i think i am going to read for C.S lewis! any way, well ...

i literally laughed cause you remind me of those teacher back in my year schools, Oh god such long time...:D any way it was amusing and lovely, i like it. ...

I like the flow very much, clearly the emotion is very Strong . but "For self-abuse, yeah. Morning often comes too soon." yeah!!! not in perfect place.... i mean you ...

Not your best, i felt the flow intended and lack much emotions............. the rhyme with "in" in each line didn't help the mood at all.... sorry it just my opinion... ...

I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE IT :D i can sense the flow. i can't see there is a need to fix anything.! :D Keep up and update us with more!

i agree with Thal, "i see the excitement and the grief in your eye" excitement doesn't match the feeling of grief :D in over all very good well done, look ...