Kim

wow this was awesome. you drew me in from the beginning and i dont even watch football. your discriptions were very vivid. the numbers stopped the flow alittle, but that ...

darn it the computer wiped out my comment. gaw, ok here goes again. :) i really enjoyed reading this, i loved the use of color to discribe the sky. a ...

i liked this. i understood ( i think) where you were going with it. basically someones life was worthless, they died, and you dont miss them. your discription showed a ...

your story keeps getting more exciting, grosse but exciting. It was dark, meaning it was nighttime. ( try rewording this , something like, "It was dark, which meant it had ...

this is great. i didnt see any errors, although i truly wasnt lookiing for any. the story line reads so smooth. it got my attention from the very first paragraph. ...

i really like the story line, but it moves way to fast. all of a sudden they are in a hotel? i think you need to stay in one place ...

this is so great, i love Goliath, he is so beautiful, i can see him and nightmare falling in love. i just love this story, i can tell you love ...

i loved the first two paragraphs, you started out very strong. Here comes the crowd of crying angels, Playing their fiddles in a strange illusion. in this part i had ...

at first i was a bit confused as to who or whom you were refering to, i am assuming it is a mother. the last line made me laugh, but ...

this is very good, but i do agree it could be alittle longer. i love the ocean and you described it well. if you dont mind a suggestion, "Almost like ...

this is very good, as i reread it a couple times, new meanings kept popping up. the last time i read, i made me think of a young runaway. taking ...

i enjoyed this, i liked how you used poppies, they are the rememberence flower of our fallen. i could visualize the little red flowers growing where the bodies lay. this ...

how do you do this? consistently write awesome poems. i just love your work. i have to wait for the writers bug to bite. i really like the how you ...

i know exactly where you are going with this. there is no privacy, and really no where to write to show your feelings without someone reading them and taking them ...

this is very good, but you are right, it is missing something. i keep rereading it to figure out what it is. it is missing something soft. ( that doesnt ...