Kale

You need to look over your punctuation more carefully, not just because you missed a couple of essential commas here and there, but also to reevaluate just how many pieces ...

First thing I noticed: you have a misspelling in the title. It should be "prospective" and not "perspective". The second thing I noticed: this poem is not very poetic. It ...

It whizzes in the atom, where you cannot know both energy and position, so are lost in that tiny space. This sentence makes no sense, and I think it may ...

The one word I would use to describe this is rushed. You have a great idea here, and you could wring a lot of drama (real drama and not cheap ...

Goodness that was long! Next time you might want to break up your story into parts so that they're far less intimidating to read. Keeping it in between 1000-2000 words ...

because in darkness the stars are bright, because in darkness and we see what is not, The repetition is redundant and so is completely unnecessary. It's like saying "kill something ...

Here is the shredding I promised you. :3 Unfortunately, there's not much to shred because there's not much substance to be shredded. This poem gives the impression of being deep ...

Hello. Me again. :P The first thing I noticed was the punctuation. Or, more accurately, the lack of it being properly used. While poetry is a bit more flexible with ...

ultraviolet was quite thorough in her corrections and suggestions. Since she was so thorough, I'll just point out the little things that caught my eye. In the first stanza, you ...

And crows fled to the Otherworld , carrying spirits on their back. These were my favorite lines. You might want to go through this again and make sure everything is ...

This poem bored me, and I started skimming around the fourth line. It's basically "I do this. I do that. I do this that. I do that that." Not very ...

Hi there. As promised, a review. I may come across as a bit harsh, but I really am trying to help. :D First things first, I feel I have to ...

Some grammar nitpicks first: Killing the sun and stopping the glow, I think a colon or m-dash would work better than a comma here. Venus and Mars cannot intervene, Minor ...

Well, Stella was pretty thorough, and she pointed out everything I wanted to point out grammar-wise, so this review shall basically be me just rambling on about what I thought. ...

The brown of the wing traverse the blue sky, But no one can see as our Griffin flies by. There are two issues with these lines, and the first is ...