Kale

Odd rhyming aside, this flowed quite well. In fact, I didn't notice the odd rhyme scheme until I looked this over more closely, and you did a good job with ...

doubt my own feelings and control. Please, I need someone to take control "Control" is repetitive. I suggest finding a synonym for one of the instances. Overall, your line breaks ...

If I have one issue with this poem, it is how you overused "they". In the first stanza, it was clear that "they" are the shadows, but throughout the rest ...

Hello there, nicchaos. The first thing I noticed was the punctuation. It was inconsistent and not always grammatically correct. Poetry generally follows the same grammar conventions as regular writing

Hello there, romance otaku. I'll be reviewing you today. I'll say first thing that the rhyme did not work for me. There is more to rhyming than having each line ...

Hello there, Kyladoot, and (a belated) welcome to YWS. If there is one thing about this poem that could use work, it is how the imagery jumps around. For instance, ...

Caressing my words to your ear, "Caressing" is misused. A caress is a gentle touch. You can gently touch something to another thing, but how do you gentle touching something ...

Right away, I noticed this: Every breathe I breath is empty. It should be "breath I breathe". "Breath" is the noun; "breathe" is the verb. When in doubt, consult a ...

Hello there. It is always so sad when works go unreviewed for so long, and so here I am to remedy that! I have to agree with Calligraphy; the ideas ...

The entire first stanza made me go "Blah." It was dull, bland, and repetitive. Most of the imagery was common and vague, with the exception of glowsticks as "tacky light ...

Lazy summer haze infects the pathways and alleys of this town a yearly disease, and our cue to come alive. I really liked the idea of summer haze infecting pathways ...

I liked how you tied the beginning and end of the poem by just slightly rephrasing and repeating the first line. It was a nice contrast. That said, your punctuation, ...

The essence; though, it may be scribbled. The essence of what? Also, you repeat "essence" three lines later, which is far too close considering how short the two lines in ...

Agreeing with ilyaeelz that the poem was a bit overwrought, and that it tried too hard to be clever. Personally, I felt the ending was too intrusive and obtuse. You ...

Letters From A Farmer In Pennsylvania, by John Dickinson in 1767 or 1768 First, "Letters..." should be either italicized or placed in quotations depending on the length of the work. ...