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Re: Made in perversion of His image (Creationists beware)
Please don't argue in my poem's thread. I got my hopes all up thinking 12 people actually responded. Pooey. I'm surprise that you guys jumped on the religion thing. This ...
Oct 1, 2005 -
Re: a poem (warning, this piece has a lot of adult language)
Heehee. Moma would call it art if the flesh has a meaningful and modern purple stripe painted on it. But, really... I don't think intention defines art in any way. ...
Sep 22, 2005 -
Re: a poem (warning, this piece has a lot of adult language)
I think a lot of bugs have crawled up a lot of asses and died. I feel sorry for them. Qi, I think you should write a poem about that. ...
Sep 22, 2005 -
Re: Jack - Writing Challenge 9/5
Wow. I forgot about the "e" thing. I just wanted to know what the words were. Good job building momentum and making me care. Congrats.
Sep 16, 2005 -
Re: The Taming of The Shrub
I couldn't read much of this because the language was so forced.
Sep 12, 2005 -
Re: Untie the Yellow Ribbon
I wouldn't worry about the political content or timing of this. Tragedy, unfortunately, is timeless, and you captured it well. I loved the music box metaphor. I found the ding-dongs ...
Sep 11, 2005 -
Re: I didn't mean to hit submit
I'm glad you hit submit. I enjoyed this. My complaint is the abundance of precise color terminology all grouped together. You use non-sequiturs very well.
Sep 11, 2005 -
Re: I'll Lower My Voice For The Winter
Wow. Good wordsmithing. You came across as very sagacious and deep. I love the title (I saw you mention it in the Launderette's thread, and went looking for it.) I'd ...
Aug 30, 2005 -
Re: Drowned
Lovely, just lovely. You made effective use of repetition. 'Like an old cheesy movie" clashes a bit with your more profound imagery.
Aug 30, 2005 -
Re: I'm So Tired
Beautiful inmagery, but I am unsure as to your intent. You lost me at the 4th line. Christmas?
Aug 30, 2005 -
Re: Poem--"To the weak it's the End"
Your best yet
Aug 25, 2005 -
Re: Untitled as of yet....
I bit wordy... actually, it sounds a lot like an english major. Just remember that words mean more but count for less in poetry. Verbal sounds and images ccount for ...
Aug 13, 2005 -
Re: Dirty Poem
I like your wordsmithing. I don't mind lines split over stanzas if they connect the two thoughts. The last line rubbed me the wrong way... I guess it's too clearly ...
Aug 2, 2005 -
Re: Dishonest, Content.
I interpret views that don't post as marks of disapproval. If you read this, please say something, even if it is "This sucks", or "I like it". I imagine all ...
Aug 2, 2005 -
Re: Reflection Isn't Enough
I like you imagery, but some of the rhythms are a bit awkward. How does the title tie in with the poem?
Aug 2, 2005