Hannah

Hmm. It's been a while since I've read Frankenstein, so I have no idea who this character is. So I won't be able to give you advice on that, but ...

This is what I first wonder about this poem: why is the listener miles away? That gives him a physical presence. What, in your subconscious, separated the land where this ...

Oh my god! I was so impressed by the intensity and genuine-ness of this poem! I was so pleased to have read it. What first really struck me were these ...

Okay. The thing is that I would do none of these things. Maybe it's just personal taste, but I don't think that second person direct address is very effective through ...

First of all, love the positivity! I think it's important for us to write poems that celebrate our happiness and pride as well as our downfalls. I know I'm prone ...

Hmm. I'm not sure I can see where you were trying to go with this poem. We suddenly can see stars? It seems very very shallow. What did you want ...

I am first going to say that I am only okay with the ten-cent words that actually do something for your poem. Gossamer is great because it builds a texture, ...

Well, your first idea certainly captures a lot of beauty, but what bothers me especially about it is how inaccurate or impossible these things would be. First, hair to her ...

So I was very interested in this poem because to me the first stanza read like the opening of a description of the downfall of earth to our own pollution. ...

I love the importance of the name in this poem, but at the same time it feels very odd to me because I have no idea what toutouwai kakariki means. ...

Hmm. There are some things I immediately like: "Life is forlorn - far." This makes me think of two sentences without using all the words required to actually form two ...

This is the only line that really hit me: We ask for forgiveness and treat it as a prize we give ourselves, not what tohers give us. For me that's ...

Hmm, is this a story? Usually when I think of what constitutes a story, I want something to change. Whether its the mindset of a character, the world around them, ...

Hmm. There's a lot going on in this poem. I wonder if you intended it to grasp at so many things? Obviously our lives deal with many things at once, ...

So, I know you asked me to review your rapist's note poem, Toe, but I think I'd have largely the same things to say about that as I would this ...