Hannah

Alright! Let's jump right in here. I'll start with my favorite section: Don't stop standing beside me I am your knight, and I believe That I must see you to ...

Oooh~ Hey there, love! Knight Hannah with one of the three reviews you've been promised from the honorable Knights of the Green Room! I'm happy I finally came around to ...

Hmm. So, this poem has a really good title and premise, especially clear in the last line. That idea of stretching time, especially in relation to the characters you've introduced ...

:O Okay, Persy. I love the associative metaphor that you work into in the second stanza. It's not straightforward. If we think of it straightforward, it seems silly. But if ...

Is this a poem to the sun or a poem to a person? I'm wondering because every stanza seems to be able to speak to the sun, right? You talk ...

Hey there, SereneSereniT! So, in the future I would DEFINITELY recommend splitting a chapter like this up into two parts. Like Chapter 6.1 and 6.1 or Chapter 6, Part 1, ...

“I’m glad to here that.” Caden said. “I was afraid you wouldn’t survive him.” Bing bing. Skipped over what I predicted -- that somehow Caden wasn't dead -- and came ...

Hey! I know it stinks that I'm jumping in at a later chapter, but this was also how I got introduced to Harry Potter. I started reading somewhere in Chapter ...

I like the unique descriptions here, Dragofriend. I love the sounds you choose to bring in: the crackles and pops. I think the unexpectedness of the word "pyromaniacs" serves to ...

First, I have to call this out: having their own private encounters under the lanterns, magnolias, maples, and stars. Fan-fricking-tabulously gorgeous line. The rhythm there is just perfect: lanterns,

Hey! Just flying through here with some quick comments, 'cause I do want to finish up all the chapters you have posted, but it's review day and the Green Room ...

I like this chapter, too. This is where the emotion comes out of the character. In chapter 5.1, it was all just held inside and expressed close to her heart. ...

You have a really lovely sense of pacing. This is a perfectly refreshing opening to the situation: genuine and honest emotion full of confusion, regret, anger, and questions. There are ...

Ooh. So even though we still haven't gotten any kind of revelation on the stress that's been described and has been piling up, we're definitely satisfied with this chapter. We ...

I think what I'd like to have seen more of in this chapter was what the last paragraph got into: the situation as relates to Jeff. That really quick insight ...