GryphonFledgling

Commenting! The boy--Please let it be him-- turns. A smile of recognition crosses his face. “Yo, Kenny!” I liked the anticipation you set up before Aiden turns around, but there ...

Hello! I'm GryphonFledgling and I'll be your reviewer today! A few general critiques: - Did you skip the third test? You go from going to Level 2 to meeting the ...

Hello there! Welcome to YWS! I'm GryphonFledgling and I'm here to review your story! *whoot* A few general critiques for you: Larii stepped forward out of the darkness of the ...

:D I checked here to be sure. 18+: A topic should be rated R if it has any of the following elements: - Graphic content - It is sexually explicit ...

Hey hi! Echoing Joy Sauce, I liked the way the dialogue read. It came across very naturally and smoothly. Very nice to read. However, my three main critiques mostly have ...

This sucked me in, if only for the panic the character felt in space. So often you see characters in space finding it calming, or loving the stars or something. ...

Where did you stop reading? At the (lack of) title. No, I'll be back to review proper. Just don't have the time at the moment. I was just going to ...

This was nice. Short, but I liked the energy it had. A few formatting/grammar nitpicks: - "Papa" and "daddy", when used as names (like a little child calling their father), ...

I liked this. I was sort of rolling with it, thinking this is going to be "just another one of those underdog sports stories" and then wham , you hit ...

You know what? I've changed my mind a little since my last review: I sort of like how the crippled kid is sort of a periphery character right now, just ...

Hi-oh! Saw the second chapter posted and figured I should read the first one... first. Mah first suggestion: go ahead and replace the text of the old version with the ...

*sniff* The description in here is beautiful. The second paragraph especially was amazing. Main thing I noticed was a bunch of little typos. I was the epitomy of her existence. ...

D'awwww. Made me want to pick her up and snug her. The first paragraph actually confused me quite a bit and I had to go back and reread the beginning ...

Hey-oh! People have already said it, but this is a little short. Who is talking? How did they get in this situation? What happens next? Has it happened before? A ...

I like this. It was clearly more of a character ramble than something with a plot (yet), but I really liked the character's voice. Even before the character himself acknowledged ...