Emerson

Death by ellipses, much? I weave characters by day , And spin plot lines at night . I form a web of lies and deceit, masked in letters . Ink ...

I liked more of the beginning than the end, because it started taking on the "big brother" thing, where as I preferred the beauty and creepy "inside the rose" idea ...

Alright, well... No, is about all I can say. Poetry (usually) is in verse, or if it isn't going to be in verse, learn the rules before you break them. ...

Poetry isn't meant to be a "woe-is-me" fest. True it is an expression of your emotions, but is an act of sharing them with the reader, not crying on them ...

First off, welcome to YWS! Be sure to keep in mind that for everyone one thing you post you should also review two. We have a post-to-review ration of 2:1. ...

The line breaks are really short, creating an annoying start-stop effect. To be completely honest, this is like a note to a best friend which you emailed to them on ...

You have all these beautiful images, but what is the subject of the poem? It is like the other one. It is beautiful, but what point are you trying to ...

Hmmm I think I'm going to do this critique in two parts. ^_^ One, harsh evil me, two, sympathetic and knowing me. One Even if it is about an important ...

I think the line breaks were too sudden. It felt really weird to read...I know it has a subject, but through most of it I am thinking, "This is all ...

This was incredebly funny, and for that, you get my points. :) Since it is set up as a news article, I can't complain about it much. It's a humorous ...

I have to say it, but I know you are a better member than that. Be sure your "I"s are capitalized, and that you have apostrophes in your contractions. Lazy ...

If you can, I would just suggest rewriting the whole thing. It is one big huge info dump, which is nasty. Why not write the whole scene out rather than ...

I don't know what part one of Chapter one was, but this is nowhere near long enough to be a piece of fiction. You should consider posting more, something around ...

Tonight the lights are dimmed; The halls fall on deaf ears. [This makes figurative sense, I think, but it's kind of weird. Perhaps I'm too literal] Each doorway an entrance ...

Arthur Miller's Death of a Salesman and Edward Albee's The Sandbox both demonstrate, through the use of nonrealism and absurdity, the idea that steadfastly following the institutionalized conventions