EllyMelly

Jayleigh - Hello, I wanted to say first off that I was immediately hooked from paragraph one! You placed in vivid descriptions of the scenery and atmosphere. (I kinda felt ...

Michael - 1) There first sentence here: "C'mooon, Keer, just... one... moredrink." ; has a little tiny mistake. Either Cait is slurring her words and jumbled these two words together ...

Sela - Like I promised, I have read all chapters up to this one. My thoughts overall: It was hilarious in some parts, very dramatic in others, and quite sad ...

Max - 1) Antilegendan. Are those real mythical creatures? Or something you made up? If you thought them up, wow, you're good. How did you come up with a word ...

Good Evening, KailaMarie. This was short and sweet and really cute. And I really liked it. I didn't particularly find any grammar mistakes, I was rather engrossed into this. It's ...

Good Morning Kelsey. Here are my thoughts and comments upon this chapter: 1) To me the first sentence is supposed to be the hook for the reader to really get ...

Good Afternoon, Ashley! Grammar thoughts: You know, Ashley, I couldn't find anything particular wrong with this chapter. No, spelling or grammar mistakes. It's like you are your own editor inside. ...

Good Morning, Fragile Heart. Wow. Wow. Wow. And wow!! This was so heartwarming and such a tearjerker. I love it! One question, though. Is this taken in the Victorian Era? ...

Good Morning Certain Romances. I swatted Sam’s hand away and gave her a stern look. The word swatted doesn't wok for me, here. Try smacked. Because swatted seems more past ...

Good Morning, Ash. Awww. How sweet. Now to my thoughts upon this chapter: With the few first sentences, I couldn't help but wonder if Anna was really dead or just ...

Good Morning, Ashley. :D Here's one thing I noticed: The mountain air teased Anna’s hair into tangles as her eyes rested on the thick vegetation and random brown rock patterns ...

Good Morning, Max! (sweet name, there) There's only two things I noticed: 1) "I apologize for spoiling your bloodust Wesley, but I think I answered that same question from a ...

Good Afternoon, sibyis! First thing off, you need to chop down your paragraphs. I know someone else already said it, but once you do so, I'm sure lots more readers ...

Good Morning, Ashley. 1) Wow, is Bennett a rakish sort of man? You know, I do love those rakes! Oh, and I really would like to know what Admiral Yalmire ...

Good Morning, Ashley. My My, what a wonderful and interesting piece. But, I shall tell you what I thought... 1) Everlancor seems like a beautiful place, but is that just ...