Dustfinger

Hey. I liked this one too! :) Again a few things you should clarify: ` “MOM?! DAD?!” I screamed over and over, falling to my knees crying. I woke with ...

Are you kidding??? Your asking me if I liked it??? I loved it!!! It seems all so real! It really sucks you in. One thing was kinda confusing though. “What ...

Good job. A few things though. I think the start of your story dosont capture the eye very well. Espeacialy with the snack thing. In my opinion it pushes the ...

Nice. i would change one thing though. What had I done to deserve this? My arms thumped to the ground on either side of me. I had so much pain ...

Wow....just....wow.....The emotions in here are so strong! i found one mistake though. I so wanted to change that. Shouldont it be "So I wanted to change that"? But I dont ...

Hey I agree with Jas. Your poem lacks some rhythm. Dont take me bad. I liked it. I really liked this part. I don’t know how I strayed from her, ...

Hey! I like it! some things though. Sure enough the sparkling glass surface of the lake came into view. Raven sped towards it hopefully. What do you mean by hopefully? ...

I love your work!!!!!!! This one especialy. The message you send out is beautiful. :smt038 I really liked this part I reach out and touch your delicate hand. You smile ...

lol. i cant help wondering what hes so good at. when does the next chapter come out? All great but this part The next second, my eyes were flickering open ...

Great again!!!!!!! You impress me each time! But one mistake I found Yes, and I’m redeeming it now. I’m homosexual again. Those friends can just burn in hell.” You forgot ...

Really good!!!!!!!! Wow. your a great writer. But one thing I shook my head, embarrassed, “Nothing.” But I had noticed that he had a Tennessee twang in his voice like ...

What if we had a song? Could we? Would you let me? Would you except me for who I am? What if I held you? And I never let go ...

“Shall we?” Martin said, cigar in hand. He straightened his jacket and fixed his hat so it was tilted yet more secure on his head. They walked up the stairs, ...

ok i got confused at this part. ""I snuggled into the warmth of his body. Still, the image of my friends’ angry expressions had me avoiding his green gaze. I ...

We acted like two people who did not know each other. He sat on the far left of the rusting bench while I sat down on the far right, avoiding ...