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Hi there. :) So, I thought this was another good chapter- but the argument towards the end bothered me. I was kind of inwardly giggling about him eating ice cream ...

I thought this was another pretty great chapter. The chasing scene seemed a bit unrealistic to me- brilliant and fun, but not quite fitting for Luke's character. Again, the description ...

This was another great piece- there were some parts that seemed a bit awkwardly worded to me, but I'm sure if you ran through it again, and perhaps read it ...

This was another great installment- really enjoying this book. :) I would recommend making Luke more reluctant about joining the family. If he is so resistant, than he wouldn't feel ...

First of all- I just noticed that this was posted on my birthday. Kudos for picking an awesome day to post it. :P Okay- now- I thought this was really ...

I thought this was nice- it was an interesting approach to the topic you were given- one I wouldn't have thought of. Nicely done for that. :) I think that ...

I thought this was a great piece- it was very simple, but flowed nicely, and started and stopped at good points. A couple things- I would recommend not starting so ...

I really like the concept of this one- nicely done. I would think about perhaps expanding the piece. As it is, it's quite repetitive, and really doesn't have much too ...

This was fantastic- the characters, the situation... everything was so original and fun. Loved the speeches, and especially the end. I don't really have anything to critique about this... it ...

This was excellent- I loved the rhyme scheme and the theme. (see what I did there? :P ) Anywho- I thought that, while this was smooth, the rhythm was off. ...

I like this piece- it has a simple message, and a nice little rhyme scheme to go with it. I would think about taking it to another deeper level, and ...

Welcome to the site! Hope you enjoy it here- it's quite a remarkable place. :) This was a great piece. :) You used the emotion very well, and I love ...

This was a fantastic piece- probably one of the best I've read on the site. I would consider, though, making the transition from talking to "you" (meaning Susie) to talking ...

This was a great piece- I loved the contrast of the subject and the description. Great concept. :) I loved the imagery and the way you incorporated yourself into the ...

This was very nicely done. I would try concentrating on the woman's fear, and perhaps try developing more a personality for the devil. Will he be pure evil? As sadistic ...