BondGirl007

Hi there Thing! Alright so what I think could really use improvement here is you need to stop telling us, and start showing. Right now it's just "I do this, ...

Okay, since it's unedited, instead of nitpicking at it, I'll just tell you some of the things that I think the actual story itself needs improving on. So the characters ...

Well as the other two reviewers said, that last stanza seems a little disconnected from the rest of the poem, because you focused so much on the daughter, and there ...

Hey Jas! Well Hawkie's right about the all telling, little showing, and you might want to work on that. But I rather like what you have here so far, it's ...

I just let myself slowly slip toward the bottom of what I was assuming was the ocean. I could feel the cold water spilling into my lungs, my eyes closing. ...

I'm finally alone at last. It's taken me all day. They can't see the beauty, even I have my doubts . And people climb the waterfall, I do hope for ...

Small, gray cloud innocent, lethargic. It sits and looks a sullen gray pitiful and sad. All alone, no friends. A small, gray cloud. Okay so this poem is very short, ...

This is a beautiful way to remember something so horrible and tragic. It's depressing to read, because I remember the day it happened. I was a little let down after ...

Hey Skins! So it's pretty much been nitpicked pretty well, so I won't repeat what's already been said. The one thing I thought was a little strange was that so ...

Hey there! Just popping in to give you a few quick tips. So first off contractions. People these days rarely say "I am sorry, I cannot do that today." they ...

Hiya there! I'm Hope and I'll be doing a review for you :D. First all the grammar errors. A car r ot was walking in the forest w hen a ...

Hi there Rose! I'm Hope, and I'll be reviewing today! This is absolutely beautiful poem, your word use is lovely, and I simply loved it. It was a tad confusing ...

Hi Baby, Bond to review again. So Skins has done yet another fantastic review and has basically covered all bases, but I'll add in a few suggestions that I hope ...

So first off definitely take the first two comments into consideration, they made points that I wanted to make, but I'd rather not repeat what has already been said. One ...

I agree with Snoink on this one, I'd like to see a little more why, and less because. But I rather liked it and enjoyed reading it, just one quick ...