Audy

Hello dolwright, First chapter was...intriguing. Intriguing because of how it was set up? Or because of its inconsistencies? Not sure. On a side note, it just so happens my name ...

Hello Scarlettfire, I went back to quickly read the first and second chapter - so consider this the all comprehensive review of all three chapters! :) I want to applaud ...

Boolovesyou, What a great piece! I enjoyed it. I felt the message was clearly executed throughout. You did a decent job narrating as well as using the images of the ...

Hello absolution, First off, I'd like to say the piece is amazing. I thoroughly enjoyed it, I thought it was quite thought provoking and the way you executed it was ...

Hello Persy, Lovely use of imagery. Afterwards, I had to google-search the title and the results left me this warm feeling of contentment. Kinda like a resonating (aha!) moment. I ...

Hello Artsy, First off, welcome to YWS! I must say, this is pretty good for your first piece up here! I enjoyed the "rawness" of it - it felt genuine. ...

Hello Alex! Sorry that it took a while for me to take a look at this. My overall impressions; The fact that this is a love story warms my heart ...

Hello sarebear, This is an interesting piece. I particularly love the structure and the concept for it, it just needs a little polishing and some revision. I actually wonder why ...

Hello Twinkle4ever, I understand you want us to give you marks out of 30, but would it really be helpful? Knowing a percentage of how you score does not improve ...

Hello blueraspberry, I actually enjoyed this piece :D It's very straightforward, but I liked the simplicity of it too. It fits the subject, the title, it doesn't try to be ...

Hello Demonness, I believe this would go under 'lyrics' yes? Or if you meant it as a poem then at least under lyric poetry. Or even 'other poetry', anything but ...

Hello Dreamwalker, Lovely piece, absolutely breath-taking. The rhythm and flow are flawless - and the images here are just beautiful, particularly enjoyed the first four lines. I see imminent reality ...

Hello BlueAfrica, I agree with Walker on this one, this piece reads more like a rant than a poem. I just have a few things to add to what was ...

Hello alliyah, Overall, I agree with formslipper. I wouldn't say this was lofty, but perhaps a bit ambitious. You have a lot of great ideas, but that is essentially what ...

Hello babymagic, This piece made me feel absolutely nothing. It's a good start, but it needs some work. Keep writing, keep experimenting, I feel like you have a lot of ...