Aquila90

Hi Peter! Here's my review :) Generally I feel something is wrong when you wrote the first paragraph. It started so mysteriously, like an image I think from either Silent ...

Hey Mentor Vyper! I must say I was hooked around halfway through your work! You have a certain flow and style which I think is unique. I can definitely see ...

Hello Xreigon! I often read short and sweet writings because I have no time...LOL but yours came across as something which I want to read to the end. Furthermore it ...

Hi Aria! At first I had no idea what the story was because I had only started on this chapter. But it was actually intriguing enough for me to look ...

Hi Jordin, when I came across fantasy or fiction stories I am always intrigued to read them. Your story has some interesting points and engaging details like the storm-light shards ...

Intriguing and gripping I would say. The direction is good and the clarity of the entire structure is well written. You might want to enhance the descriptions of the surroundings ...

Ok there are a couple of things which I feel needs a little more attention to. Although the text is understandable, there are several problems of sentence structure, flow and ...

There is a good direction in the overall story; at first I thought it was a murder/suspense thriller before the mentioning of 'Daddy.' Yet you nicely led the reader to ...

I found the text confusing and a little hard to read. It was lacking in certain key descriptions in the first chapter that I needed to re-read it to roughy ...

This was quite engaging and well paced throughout. I personally liked the way you play with structure and repetition; almost as if poetry is weaved into the prose. "Screamed as ...