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322sivart

  • Short Story » General, General Re: The Plan in Your Head

    Hey Casey, I'm here as requested! This piece was truly amazing, no joke. I wasn't really affected by this story at all until I reached the end, but then I ...

    Feb 13, 2011
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: My worst friend. My best enemy.

    Hey emoticon! Thanks to be the first to post on my thread! The first thing that stuck out when I read this was that you should separate this into stanzas, ...

    Feb 13, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Did you?

    I liked the idea of this poem, but I think it was just a bit too long and choppy. Sometimes I write poetry in the "list" format, but if you ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: My Story

    wow. This poem really is incredible. One thing that I loved about it was that you didn't have to make too many metaphors or be symbolic about anything to write ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: If I Had Wings

    Wow. I'm sorry that I don't have anything productive to say about this poem. It was just excellent! I'm usually not picky or anything when I read poetry, because it ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Statistics

    This is interesting. Maybe because I didn't read it enough times or I didn't read this well enough, but I just don't understand what you're getting at. -Is your character ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Blood chapt.1

    Overall, I thought this was interesting. Personally, I found your Holocaust story to be much more gripping, but nevertheless, here's what I thought about this story: Prologue: "First, what makes ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Bittersweet December

    The first thing that I observe when I read this poem is that unlike much of the dramatic poetry that I read, your poem rhymes. I also think that you ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Breathe (1)

    I thought this was interesting, and I would like to see where this story goes. The flow and pace of the story were good, and so was the character development. ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Cave Between Lands, Chapter One

    I have to say that the reason why this chapter of your story is incredible in particular is because it can really go in any direction it likes. I love ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Deleted

    I really like this. One major observation of mine is that I can't tell if you deliberately wanted to rhyme in some places and then didn't in others. I'm assuming ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Romantic, General Re: Watch Out - chapter 1

    I really like this. For a story such as this, I think that a first person point of view is essential, so I'm glad you made it that way. You ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Sam I Am (Prologue)

    While reading this, I am confused about many things. I don't know what kind of audience you are writing for. The fact that you censored the word "piss" makes me ...

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: If I ever,

    This is great, I love it! Just as IcyFlame said, I have never been a fan of sad romantic poetry, but I really love this. There are really no productive ...

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Romeo and Juliet

    I really liked it. But as someone has mentioned before me, it's difficult to figure out where to put the stress on each line. I have never read the story ...

    Feb 10, 2011


You'd better wise up, Pony... you get tough like me and you don't get hurt. You look out for yourself and nothing can touch you, man.
— Dallas Winston, The Outsiders