1stViolinS.C.

Hi... First, I like this story. It's been several times before ;), but I've never read one that has another suitor competing for the girl ;). But anyways, hold on ...

Hey! Sorry it took me so long to review one of these, but here I am ;). I actually had a hard time finding something to say about it besides ...

Wow! I really like this. This is amazing, I love Harry Potter books and pretty much anything having to do with them. Still, just in my personal opinion, you should ...

Hey again! This, like the chapters before it, is pretty good. However, there are a couple things that confused me. First of all, I never really understand quite why she ...

AUGH!!! I can't believe the chapter ended! I can't believe that Jared has a new girlfriend! Anyways, I like your story. I really couldn't find much to critique about it. ...

Okay, first of all, this sounds very British. The other chapters didn't sound that way to me, so you need to either change the other chapters to sound British, or ...

He gave me a hug that I was so much in needed for. [quote] Here, this needs to say "that I was in need for" or "that I needed so ...

Why did it end?!? This was such an amazing story!!! I really hope that you are planning on writing more of this. I will be forever stuck reading these 18 ...

I love this! It's so sweet. Even though I'm assuming this is an unedited draft, you should still use punctuation and stuff. It just makes it easier to read the ...

Aw! I love this! It's so cute. I love it when stories end happily like that. Still, you kinda need punctuation and stuff. It just makes it easier to read. ...

Hey! I like this story. It's pretty cool. There are a couple things you should fix though. One, Matt (not Mark, right?) talks about the B-something (sorry, I can't remember ...

Okay. I really, really, like this story. It's got a really unique storyline. I hope you write lots more of it soon.:) The only thing is that in some spots, ...

Okay, I can see what the story is supposed to be, but it's hard to read. You probably don't want to hear this, but it will most definitely be better ...

Wow. This was really interesting. I have to say that I've honestly never thought about anybody writing anything like that in a Harry Potter story. It was very creative. Something ...

Oh, wow, I completely love it. You have my approval :wink: . Something you may want to think about changing, though, is that there are parts where the characters go ...