he painted a meadow
green with flowers, colors begging to be freed from the canvas
and he knelt in the dying light
as he painted a perfect sky-
blue with white cotton clouds
and sunbeams dancing across the green.
and he crouched in the darkness and he painted a lamb
like snow in the springtime
grace freed from anguish
Rejoice! it speaks
for this life is sweet
Rejoice! for spring is upon us
and the sun has appeared
and the flowers have bloomed.
Rejoice! for there is hope, says the lamb.
and the painter, he paints a world where it listens
a world of innocence, peace, forgiveness-
he paints, colors drying and trapped in the canvas,
as the claustrophobia creeps to reach him
in his Paradise.
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140,179 Literary Works • 673,037 Reviews
Hello, Stature here to review your work!
The imagery in this is beautiful. Rather than just a description of a paradise, you made it unique and transformed it into the painter's Paradise.
I particularly loved the Rejoice parts. They speak of such hope. I find then effective in the fact that whilst you are describing a paradise, they speak of how to create one of your own.
The rhythm of this poem is incredibly well-paced, and I honestly feel like it times with the brushstrokes of the painter.
There are a few issues with capitalisation and punctuation but these have been mentioned below.
Again, an beautiful poem. I can't wait to read more!
-Stature
Hey! I'm Aarica, and I'm here to review your poem.
I loved this! The way I could perfectly see what was happening (also known as imagery lol) was amazing! The way you portrayed your character's view of "paradise" was awesome.
A few little problems were your punctuation and your capitalization, just a few minor things that can be fixed up real quick.
Keep up the good work, love!
~Aarica
Hi, I'm Andy and I'm here to review your work!
I loved this so much. The imagery was perfection in my opinion. Your word choice was beautiful. It reminds me that I believe in higher places, to be honest. The beauty of God's heaven is what I yearn for I guess and I don't know if that's what you meant behind this poem but that's my interpretation. I just have to say, you use capitalization a few times but its not for major words so I'm slightly confused. I think that if it is used, then use it or just get rid of it completely. I hope that makes sense. Other than the confusing capitalization this was beautiful and well written. Keep up the good work! 
Hope you enjoy.
Oh, thank you so much! Yeah, I agree about the punctuation. It wasn't my intention; the only words I wanted capitalized were Rejoice and Paradise. The others were just mistakes because of autocorrect, as I was doing it on my phone at time, so I'll change it as soon as I can. Thank you so much for the positive feedback!